Since the novel coronavirus hit in march, unemployment rates have been on the rise and many people have been concerned about the state of their wages. For those who are working, some people have had their salaries dropped, and I have many friends and family members who are worried that, if a second wave of the virus happens, they will lose their jobs, too.
I have never had a consistent income. Before and during college, I worked part-time jobs to make ends meet, and after school, I worked mostly freelance jobs, which meant there was never a consistent amount of money coming in. This never bothered me – I learned how to manage my money in a way that worked for me. So, when the virus hit, and my freelance jobs began to disappear, the way I budgeted my money actually stayed the same.
Many people take specific amounts out of their paychecks each week or month for savings or to give to charity. Because I have never had a consistent amount of money coming in, instead of taking out specific amounts of money, I split up my paycheck by percentages. This way, no matter how much I am earning, I always know how much money I have available for spending, how much should go into savings, the minimum amount I want to give to charity, etc.
This is not the ideal way for everyone to split up their incoming funds, but it works for me. And during such uncertain times, when paychecks seem to be less consistent for many people, I thought I would share how I split up my money as a possible option for others. You can use the percentages listed below, or just use my formula as a starting point to create a budget that works best for you!
My budget
Spend account – 60 percent (40 percent for essentials and 20 percent for recreational spendin)
The biggest chunk of my money goes into my spend account. The key here is that, hopefully, I won’t actually spend all of this money. This account also functions as a short-term savings account for bigger, unexpected expenditures. This is always the account I dip into first for any purchases, big or small, expected or unexpected.
Charitable giving – 10 percent
Ten percent of everything I earn is donated to charitable organizations of my choice. The organizations I donate to most frequently include Compassion International (I sponsor a child living in Ecuador), the Ulman Foundation, and United Church. I love also letting this account build up sometimes, so when I am asked for more sizable donations, I have the means to give. To be honest, though, I have a hard time saying “no” to people when they ask for support, so this account normally drops into a deficit, meaning I take some funds out of my spend account to donate, too.
Savings – 10 percent
Ten percent of everything I earn also immediately goes into savings. These are my long-term savings that I don’t touch unless it is an absolute emergency, or for very large purchases that I can’t cover from my spend account alone. As suggested by Dave Ramsay, I always try to have a minimum of $1,000 in this account in case of an emergency.
Adventure Fund – 10 percent
I am a saver, not a spender. I learned a long time ago that this meant I rarely spent on myself, which meant I ended up never doing anything that I really wanted to do with my life. So, I wrote myself a bucket list, and anytime I take a step towards achieving one of those goals, I take the money from my adventure fund. It’s a savings account for all of the life experiences I want to have. These include fun trips, like my road trip to Colorado, but also more practical purchases that are important to me, such as going to college and buying a home in the future.
Loan payments – 10 percent
Another 10 percent of my paycheck is designated to pay off debts, such as college loans. If there isn’t enough in this account to pay for loans, I take money out of my spend account, adventure fund, and savings (I also often take money from these accounts anyway to put extra money on my loan payments – the faster they are paid off, the better).
For me, having a budget has not been restrictive, but freeing! Knowing what I have to spend and feeling reassured that I have money set aside for paying off debts and saving for the future makes me feel more comfortable spending money on things that I want and need.
Comment below if you have tips to share on how you best budget your money, or if you have any questions about my budget formula!
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It seems like the novel coronavirus is not going anywhere soon, so we have all been tasked with finding ways to navigate this “new normal.” For travel enthusiasts, like me, that can be a difficult task considering the amount of risk and restriction associated with travel. Airports are practically a breeding ground for the virus, and every country and state has different mandates about how and when people are allowed to visit.
It is recommended to stay at home as much as possible unless travel is essential, but sometimes, we all need to step outside of our homes for our own mental health. If that’s you, consider using these tips to keep your travels as safe as possible.
1. Do your research
Research your own state’s laws and the laws of the state or country you are planning to travel to. Know what the restrictions are and what is required of you, such as having an extended quarantine when you arrive at your destination or after you return home. If you can limit your travel to within your own state, that’s even safer, and it can be more realistic if you can’t take the time off to quarantine from your job.
2. Wear a mask
Joseph and me on a main street in Leesburg, Virginia, where we were visiting Joseph’s sister, Jo, and her husband, Dan
Whether your state or the place you are visiting requires it, wear a mask. The most recent research shows that this protects not only the people around you, but yourself as well. Make sure the mask you are wearing is approved by the CDC, and please wear it over your mouth and nose. Both your mouth and nose lead to your respiratory system, so there is absolutely no point in leaving your nose exposed.
If you can, avoid international travel or travel to faraway states that requires a plane ride. Airports pose a much larger risk of contracting and spreading the virus than your own vehicle. If you can stay within your own state, even better. But if you want to travel out-of-state, consider the idea of road tripping there. The great part of this is driving to your destination enables you to see more of the scenery and to stop at other places along the way that seem fun or interesting. Make a road trip playlist (or use mine below) to listen to some entertaining tunes along the way.
4. Keep your hands as clean as possible
Wash your hands frequently, and keep a bottle of hand sanitizer in your car for times when you can’t. Keeping your hands clean dramatically reduces your chance to contracting and spreading the virus. And remember, even when you think your hands are clean, do NOT touch your face!
5. Stay away from other people as much as possible
If you are traveling simply to get out of the house, consider alternatives to hotel stays and popular tourist attractions. Hiking, fishing, and other outdoor activities are great alternatives to walking busy streets. Consider packing your own food or getting takeout rather than dining at a restaurant. And while the weather is still warm, camping can be a more affordable and safer alternative to hotel stays.
Traveling to other places is fun, but it only seems worth it when you really get to experience those places. The good news is that the tourist attractions are often not the best way to achieve this – the best way to experience a place is to go where the locals go. So, again, do your research. Make a list of the places you want to visit and things you want to do that are low-risk, such as visiting national parks, scenic points, local eateries that are offering carry-out, and main streets in small towns.
7. Get tested for COVID-19 when you come home
Whether your state recommends it or not, a safe step you can take at the end of your trip is getting tested for COVID-19 as soon as you return and quarantining until you get the results. Waiting to interact with other people until you know you’re safe can help prevent the spreading of the virus to dozens of people. It’s always better to be safe than sorry, so if you are willing to take the risk of traveling, consider making sure that you are the only one who experiences any potential consequences of that choice.
Traveling can be a great way to take care of your mental health and get active in your daily life, but during times like this, it should always be done with caution and forethought. Don’t stop living life, but make sure when you do embark on any adventures, you are doing so safely for yourself and others.
Holistic wellness and medicine is gaining prominence in the medical and health community, and supplements are one of the main products at its core. However, with little regulation on these products, especially in the United States, and with so many supplements to choose from, it can be difficult to know what you need and what is actually going to work.
This is where ZYTO scans come into the equation.
ZYTO is an international company focused on producing software designed to give insight and guidance for health and wellness decisions. Founded in 2004 by Dr. Vaughn Cook, ZYTO is one of the leaders of biocommunicaton technology in the world.
My story
I have to admit, I was greatly skeptical of the ZYTO software the first time I came in contact with it. I had been struggling with chronic health issues for eight years, and it had gotten to the point that my digressing health consumed much of my energy and time. After multiple doctors had failed to successfully treat my diagnoses, or even realize what was wrong, I tried the ZYTO scan as a last ditch effort to improve my health.
After spending much of my life being poked and prodded with needles and more invasive procedures, the idea of having my health problems understood simply by placing my hand on a cradle seemed much too simplistic. When the scan was finished, I was given a long list of supplements recommended to bring my body to a more balanced state. Because neither the scan nor the supplements were covered by insurance, I disappointedly handed over hundreds of dollars that day with little hope that anything in my life would change.
However, after years of struggling to find help and a cure for my illness, it was only a mere two weeks after taking the supplements that I began to feel a difference. My irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and leaky gut symptoms improved, my headaches and body pain began to fade, and the heaviness I had felt for years started to lift away. I had more energy, a larger appetite, and a new zest for life. My mood improved, as did my capacity to mentally handle tasks that before had been challenging. As time went on, I began to be able to eat foods that before had been restricted from my diet, and I began to chase dreams that I had never thought possible, such as running across the country last summer.
How does a ZYTO scan work?
So, how does the ZYTO scan work? First, it’s important to recognize that the ZYTO scan is not a diagnostic tool. It is not meant to replace doctors or western medicine, but it is meant to serve alongside these other health modalities to create a holistic wellness program. The hope is that the supplements recommended will help support someone who is pursuing a healthy lifestyle.
To recommend supplements, the scan uses a galvanic skin response, which measures fluctuations in electrical conductivity of the skin. You may be familiar with this technology as it is used in lie detector, or polygraph, tests. Galvanic skin responses have also been used to do psychological research, psychotherapy, media and ad testing, usability testing, and neuroscience. By using a galvanic skin response, the ZYTO technology is able to tell if your body has a positive or negative response to different substances, including different foods, supplements, and health services, such as massage or chiropractic care. The ZYTO software analyzes the responses given to determine which of these foods, supplements and health modalities can help bring the body into a balanced, healthy state.
Is the ZYTO scan for me?
The best thing about a ZYTO scan is it can help anyone, no matter where they are in their health journey. Whether you are currently being treated for a medical diagnosis, working on losing weight or building muscle through personal training and/or nutrition coaching, or just trying to live a healthier lifestyle, the ZYTO scan is a tool that will only benefit your health journey. It serves alongside your current medical and health treatments to better help you achieve your goals and have a healthy lifestyle.
Getting a ZYTO scan
If you are interested in getting a ZYTO scan, or just learning more about the technology and what getting a scan looks like, consider using Evolve. I offer ZYTO scans at a competitive, affordable price because I strongly believe everyone should have access to becoming their healthiest self. I work with Nature’s Sunshine, a reputable supplement company that has been offering affordable, high-quality supplements for 50 years. Most importantly, though, I want to work with you. Getting a scan with Evolve means that your health goals and personal lifestyle will always be taken into account, and the supplements I recommend will always be secondary to suggesting dietary and lifestyle changes that will help you achieve the life you want without having to buy anything. My goal is always to help you become the healthiest, happiest version of yourself through the most natural means possible.
To learn more & schedule a FREE 15-minute consultation, click here.
When the novel coronavirus changed the world in March, it was difficult to imagine what a future would look like. I took my life day by day, watching, observing, and trying to construct some form of comfort and continuity in my life.
In the five months that have passed since that time, it has still been a struggle to find solace in a world that is rapidly changing around me. I have spent far too much time trying to plan for a future that is still mostly unknown. The few things that have brought me some consolation are the people in my life and the adventures I have taken now that my schedule is oddly free. It was these two things that brought me to Pennsylvania.
Traveling during the coronavirus can be daunting, especially when restrictions are constantly changing. However, after checking the latest travel restrictions this past week, I made plans to visit the state just next door to me where two people I was very excited to see are currently living.
Since the start of the pandemic, I have not seen any friends in person. Apart from my new fiancé and a few of his family members, I have socially distanced myself from everyone. I have heard it has been suggested to call social distancing “physical distancing” to encourage people to still have social interactions through less conventional means, such as Zoom or FaceTime. Unfortunately, in my case, physical distancing really did become social distancing – text messages went unanswered and video calls became less frequent as people have grown tired of the constant screen time and so little authentic time spent with people.
Caitlin & me at Stevenson University’s Relay for Life in 2018
So, when Caitlin and Mark agreed to meet for dinner in their town of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, I jumped at the chance to do a little more traveling and see two people I have dearly missed.
Caitlin and I became friends my first year at Stevenson University, and we have been close ever since. She invited me to come with her to Campus Crusade for Christ, an organization on campus focused on helping college students grow in their faith. It was there that I met Mark, who was one of the leaders in the club. The following year, Caitlin and Mark started dating. It was obvious from the beginning of their relationship that the two of them were perfect for one another. This past June, just 10 days after my own engagement, Mark proposed. So, this dinner was not just one to catch up, but to celebrate the life milestone we had all taken very recently.
Joseph and I woke up early Saturday morning to get a jumpstart on our traveling. It is on our bucket list to visit all 50 states, and this was our chance to cross Pennsylvania off our list.
In order to officially say we visited a state, there are a couple of things we have agreed we need to do. We have to explore a main street, eat (or drink) at a local restaurant, hike at a national park, and visit a tourist or scenic spot. Once we have done all of these things, we can go to a local Starbucks to buy our “Been There” series mug.
So far this summer, we have visited Colorado, Maryland and Virginia. Suffice it to say, I was very excited to add a fourth mug to our collection that has been growing on my windowsill.
Our first stop was Gettysburg National Military Park, a place shrouded in American history. The morning was thankfully still cool when we began our relaxed, four-mile hike on the Johnny Reb Trail. The paved path wound through cemeteries and monuments commemorating the lives of fallen soldiers and to tell the story of the Battle of Gettysburg. Stone statues marked the spots where the infantry moved during the fight. According to the National Park Service website, the Battle of Gettysburg was a turning point during the Civil War that helped secure the eventual victory of the Union. Known for being the bloodiest battle of the Civil War, it was this particular battle that inspired President Lincoln’s famous “Gettysburg Address.”
Our next stop was Starbucks. It was a little early in the day to already be buying our mug, but we knew we wouldn’t check off all our destinations until that night, and since it was now late morning, we were both desperate for coffee. We bought our mug and two lattes, and then we headed to downtown Gettysburg to walk Steinwehr Avenue, our main street of choice for the day.
While we had been hiking, I had seen people dressed in nineteenth-century style clothing. I had assumed these people were tour guides or people doing reenactments at the park. However, as we walked down the street, we saw multiple people dressed in the same garb. Some played the part of their costume, talking as if they had just stepped off the battlefield, while others I caught checking their cell phones that they had hidden away in their petticoats. Either way, their attire alongside the classic architecture and shops filled with historical artifacts created an immersive experience I thoroughly enjoyed.
After walking around town, we drove to Lancaster. Our dinner reservation was not for a few hours, but we had bought tickets to ride on the Strasburg Railroad, the oldest continuously operating railroad in the country. According to the Strasburg Railroad website, the railroad was founded in 1832 to transport both freight and passengers across Pennsylvania. Neither Joseph nor I had ever ridden on a train before. We excitedly boarded the bright red locomotive and sat across from each other on the bench seats. When the whistle blew and the train chugged out of the station, we stuck our heads out of the windows to feel the wind against our faces and to watch the corn fields whizz past.
While riding, we were treated to learning a bit of Pennsylvania history, culture and superstition. We were told that it had been this train that had taken Abraham Lincoln and his wife, Mary, to his inauguration in 1861. Unfortunately, a mere four years later, it was also the train that had taken Mary and the body of the deceased president back home. Out our windows, we were able to see Amish farmers working in the fields while we learned from our tour guide about the plain lifestyle. Almost halfway through our trip, the train came to a full stop, and our guide encouraged us to be very quiet so we could hear the ghost whistle of the engine on the Lancaster, Oxford and Southern Railway, which has been out of service since 1918. Our train’s whistle pierced the air, and without a second’s delay, another whistle answered.
“Is it an echo,” I asked Joseph at the same time he turned to me and posed the same question.
“Did someone ask if it was an echo,” our tour guide asked jovially over the loudspeaker. “I am so disappointed. We pay that farmer 27 dollars a day just to whistle back at us.” I laughed, unsure if the guide was joking or not. I guess we will never know for sure if it is an echo, another whistle, or if there really is a ghost locomotive riding the rails in Pennsylvania.
We had a little extra time between the end of our ride and dinner, so we headed to downtown Lancaster to walk another main street. As soon as we stepped out of the car, a candy store caught my eye. I ran to it like an excited child while Joseph lagged behind.
Sweetish Candy is a Swedish candy and hygge shop that sells imported Scandinavian goods, including a plethora of sweets made with wholesome ingredients. Entranced by all the goodies, we bought two bars of Icelandic bitter chocolate made with Icelandic sea salt and bourbon vanilla. After spending so much time roaming around the shop we had very little left to explore the main street, so we headed back to our car to go to dinner. A nearby gas station bathroom served as our spot to get ready, so when we walked into the restaurant, we looked as if we had not been running around in the humid Pennsylvania heat all day.
We met Cait and Mark at Loxley’s, a popular, upscale restaurant in Pennsylvania. To enter, we walked across a bridge that overlooked a manmade pond filled with ginormous lily pads and big, bright orange fish. Our friends, who had arrived a few minutes before us, were seated on the patio outside. We greeted each other with hugs and exclamations of congratulations. As our waiter, Jonah, served us drinks and appetizers, Caitlin and I studied each other’s rings while we all had the chance to share the stories of our proposals and how life and wedding planning has been going since then. Once dinner was served, we turned the conversation to what post-graduation life has been like, to our work lives, and to sharing how general life during a pandemic has affected each of us. The world grew dark around us as we continued talking long after the plates had been cleared and our glasses had emptied, enjoying the experience of finally being able to talk with close friends without a screen placed between us.
As Cait and I both began to yawn, Joseph and Mark called an end to the evening. We hugged goodbye, promising to visit again soon, and then each returned to our own cars. On the drive home, I felt a sense of peace that I have not yet experienced since the beginning of the pandemic. Life has not returned to normal, and I don’t think it ever will, but the day’s adventures had been a reassurance that this new way of living can still be just as enjoyable and exciting.
Traveling through a place filled with history was a reminder to me of just how much the world has changed and how much it will continue to change throughout my life. Walking around town surrounded by people in bonnets and top hats reminded me that wearing a mask is simply the latest change in fashion, and to be perfectly honest, I would happily choose to wear that than the corsets I saw those other women donning. Like the first gunshot fired during a war, the novel coronavirus changed the world as we know it forever, and we are now in the midst of understanding what this new world will be like. However, in the thick of all this uncertainty, there are two things I now know for sure that have given me hope: First, that life is always changing, so the best way to live life to the fullest is to embrace the new and seek to find ways to still confront and encounter even more novel experiences. And secondly, it will always be the people in my life and the relationships I have built that will bring me comfort in times of elation and struggle, and though it may try, social distancing cannot take that away from me.
Life is not what it used to be, but hopefully, with a little mindset shift and perhaps a little extra effort, we can make it even better than what we ever envisioned.
P.S. Joseph has launched his vlog! Check out his perspective of today’s events by watching the video below. If you like it, please consider subscribing to his YouTube channel – every follow helps.
Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you purchase a product after clicking the associated link, I will earn a small commission off of that purchase.
One of my favorite things about summer is the fresh produce. I love walking into my own backyard and finding inspiration for cooking from the vegetables in my garden. And one of my favorite vegetables is zucchini. It’s so versatile – it’s delicious baked, fried, steamed, or sauteéd, and it can be used a number of ways in dishes, from zoodles to zucchini bread.
Lately, my garden has been giving me zucchini the size of baseball bats, so I decided to use its size to my advantage and make the vegetable the star of my dish. Zucchini boats were the first recipe that came to mind.
Zucchini boats are a favorite of mine because they can be used in any type of cuisine. The zucchini simply acts as the vehicle for whatever you would rather be eating. It’s a low-carb way to make a filling, nutritious, vegetable-packed meal.
Because I had marinara sauce sitting in my cupboard, I decided to go with an Italian spin for tonight’s dinner. Below is the recipe I created, but feel free to experiment with your favorite flavors and the ingredients you have in your cupboard. The oven temperature and cooking times should be relatively stable for just about any filling options.
I hope you enjoy the recipe! Please feel free to leave me a comment about how the recipe turned out for you, or to share your favorite way to make zucchini boats.
Italian Zucchini Boats
Makes: 2 generous servings
Ingredients:
1 zucchini (my zucchini are so big, I used half of one – like I said, they are the size of baseball bats)
1 cup marinara sauce (for a low-FODMAP option, I used Rao’s Homemade Sensitive Marinara sauce – it’s so delicious, you will never miss the onion and garlic)
8oz cooked chicken breast, chopped, or ground chicken (see Notes for how I baked my chicken breast)
2/3 cup shredded mozzarella cheese, divided
grated Parmesan cheese, for serving
Directions:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Line a baking dish with foil and spray with cooking spray.
Cut zucchini in half lengthwise and scoop out the seeds, leaving the ends intact to create small “boats” (this is to make sure the filling does not pour out the sides while baking).
In a medium-sized bowl, combine cooked chicken, marinara sauce, and 1/3 cup mozzarella cheese. Fill the zucchini with the mixture.
Bake for 25 minutes, or until a fork inserts easily into the zucchini.
Sprinkle zucchini with remaining 1/3 cup mozzarella cheese. Bake for another two minutes, or until the cheese melts.
Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and serve.
Notes:
The best way I have found to cook moist, delicious chicken breasts is to place them in a baking dish coated in cooking spray and then cover them with parchment paper. Bake the chicken breasts at 400 degrees F for 40 minutes. It’s cooked perfectly every single time. For this recipe, I rubbed my chicken breasts with Italian seasoning before baking.
“Without Tyler Didra, I certainly would not be where I am today. Today, I am in charge of my own health, nutrition, and fitness goals. I first sought out Tyler after seeing advertisements for her on campus at Stevenson University. I was on the verge of an eating disorder and a heartbreaking tear from my family who at the time did not know how to properly encourage my weight loss goals. Having a myriad of health problems and physical immobility challenges, Tyler tailored each aspect of her services directly to me. Half-way throughout personal training season, I had ankle surgery and Tyler jumped at the chance to customize my exercise program to chair positions, sitting kick-boxing, and non-weight bearing drills.
“My biggest challenge before experiencing Tyler’s phenomenal training was fear of the gym and a general lack of education regarding both nutrition and physical fitness. I would have never stepped into a gym before Tyler encouraged me it wasn’t such a scary place after all. My body is completely different than it was three years ago; healthy, muscular, confident, and flexible. We started our journey together understanding food groups, different types of workouts, and how to live confidently. Over time she helped me graduate to yoga and today I am strong enough to challenge myself bi-weekly to Barre classes. She took an ankle that was unbearable to walk on and helped me strengthen it to this day where I can walk, run, and even do the most complex ankle yoga-poses.
“Tyler is a joy to her clients and each member of her Stevenson University fitness classes. From Yoga, to Pilates, and Women on Weights, she inspires young men and women to branch out and try something new to further challenge their minds and bodies. I give her my highest praise and openly endorse each and every one of her services from ZYTO scans, personal training, nutrition coaching, and group fitness classes. Because of her, I live an active and healthy lifestyle led by my own personal choices and goals.”
My last morning in Arizona began the same as many others. I woke up early to beat the heat of the day. I went for a run with my dad, this time taking extra note to the beauty of the scenery: The red earth; the tall, desert cacti; the clear, blue sky without a cloud in sight. We finished our run at Starbucks, where we ordered lattes. When we returned to the house, we ate breakfast with Bev and Gus. I soaked in my last few moments with my family, studying their features and listening to their laughter.
The time to leave came far too quickly. We hugged our loved ones goodbye, promising to visit again soon. Hopefully, there will not be another decade between now and our next visit. Jake, Mom, Dad, and I piled our luggage into the van and then climbed inside. We waved one last time to Bev and Gus, who were standing in the doorway of their home, and then we began the hour-long drive to the airport.
It was a quiet, somber trip. None of us were quite ready to leave. We had enjoyed the time spent with family in Arizona; we all wanted just one more day to fully appreciate how precious that time had been.
When we arrived at the airport, we returned our rental car and then took the shuttle to our terminal. We were running late, and I was getting nervous. I kept checking my watch as the minutes dwindled down. However, the airport was nearly empty once again. We made it through baggage claim and security in record time. There were even a few minutes to spare for a quick snack before we boarded our plane.
Today’s flight home was easier than the trip to Arizona had been. Instead of two flights with an unnecessarily long layover in between, we had one four-and-a-half-hour flight straight back to our destination. Instead of sleeping on this flight, I decided to finish my book, Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness by Susannah Cahalan. The book kept me at rapt attention, turning pages feverishly throughout, until I finally reached the last, eloquently written paragraph.
While reading, I was treated to the cacophony of, not just one, but two crying babies. When one stopped, the other picked up her shift. On rare occasion, we were treated to a lovely duet. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the parents as my fellow passengers grew restless in their seats. Luckily, it seemed that most people on the airplane had come prepared with headphones and earplugs, so there were no voiced complaints.
I had nearly reached the end of my book when the plane began to descend. I looked up from the words to glance out the airplane window at the perfect moment. Rippling water basking in the sunlight wound through tall, green trees that covered the land. Upon the water, a lonely boat cut through the waves in the direction of a distant bridge. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the sight. It was as if, in just a week of being away, I had forgotten how much I loved the trees and adored the greenery that surrounded me at home. I had forgotten the summer days I am accustomed to, lying on a boat or on the shore of a beach with the hot sand between my toes, soaking up the sunshine.
Me hiking at Oregon Ridge Nature Center in Baltimore County
“Look at all that humidity,” the passenger behind me grunted.
Oh, yes, I can’t forget the humidity, too. We are back in Maryland, the state of muggy summers; brilliant thunderstorms; tasty blue crabs served with Old Bay; and bright, black-eyed Susans. We are back in the state where I grew up, where I feel a familiar sense of comfort no matter where I have been or how long I have been gone. We are home.
It was another hot morning in Arizona. After being here for a week, I thought my body would be used to it, but every time I step out of the house, it still seems to come as a surprise. The heat is relentless, and the sun seems to be trying as hard is it can to sear every living thing, including me.
I woke up early again today to go running before the sun rose too high in the sky. The one thing I will admit about the dry Arizona heat is that it’s better running weather than the humidity in Maryland. Here, I can keep my stride going well into the 90s, but back home, anything over 80 degrees is too hot – I start sweating as soon as I step outside. I have enjoyed my runs here more than those I was having back on the east coast during our latest heat wave.
Dad and I finished our run a little after 7:00 and bought coffees once again at Starbucks. It is becoming a bit of an expensive tradition, but nothing compares to that little jolt of espresso after a hot morning run.
Today was our last full day in Arizona, and we planned to spend it as we had the rest of this trip – visiting and getting to know family. Before relatives arrived at the house, Bev and Gus took us shopping at a local store to buy souvenirs, and then they gave us a small tour around their retirement community. My favorite part was the garden, which included a meditation area with a fountain and a large model train adorned with cute little houses, moving figurines, and a zoo (which, oddly enough, housed a dinosaur). The tour took place from the inside of our air conditioned car because today was the hottest day we had experienced yet. I am surprised the thermometer did not break. It was over 110 degrees by the time we got back to the house to prepare lunch.
Annette, my mother’s cousin, was the first to visit. We ate hors d’oeuvres and talked about our summers – Annette just recently retired from being a nurse and bought a new home not far from where Bev and Gus live. I have only met Annette one other time in my life, so it was nice to have the chance to catch up and visit again.
After she left, we only had an hour before our next guests arrived. Jocelyn, Pam’s daughter, and her new boyfriend, Riley, were out of town when visited Pam’s house on Sunday, so they decided to drive to see us on our last evening here. They brought Hazel, Jocelyn’s energetic, two-year-old dog, who brought smiles to all of our faces with her kisses and puppy cuddles.
Once again, I was excited about the chance to visit with family I had never met before. Jocelyn and I found that we have a lot in common, including the fact that we are both currently on the low-FODMAP diet. For the first time on this trip, I was not the only one with unusual dietary restrictions. Riley, Jocelyn and I talked about school and their recent trip to California. The two of them will be returning to school in a few weeks for their second year of college. It was nice to be able to talk with family members so close in age and with whom I had so much in common; we were able to talk about our lives with ease.
From left to right: Annette, Gus and Mom
The evening hours flew by, and before we knew it, our dinner plates had been cleared, dessert had been served, and it was time to say goodnight. Once again, we faced saying farewell to people without knowing when we would see them again. Then we went to bed knowing we would have to do the same with Bev and Gus tomorrow, which, after days of growing to know them better and love them even more, would be even harder.
I have one more night in Arizona. I will have one more early morning run, one more hot latte, one more breakfast with family, and then I will be flying on a plane back to Maryland. The trip went by far too fast. I would love to have the chance to stay just a few days longer to explore more of Arizona and spend more time with these people I have grown to love even more. I am so grateful that, despite with everything currently happening in the country and the world, this trip was still possible. For much of the summer, I feared we would not even make it to Arizona. And now that I have been here, I know it’s going to be even harder to stay away.
It will not be another decade before I return. I am going to visit again soon, but this time, I am going with experience, which means I am not coming back in July. A pleasant, winter trip to a balmy 70 degrees sounds like a delightful vacation that I am thoroughly looking forward to.
After nearly a week spent in Arizona, the end of my vacation looming not far into the future, I finally had the chance to experience the state for the beautiful place it is.
Our destination today was Sedona. My dad and I got up early again to run before the heat of the day hit. After the workout, we enjoyed coffees and breakfast as a family, and then we headed out to embark upon our adventure.
Sedona is over two hours away from where Bev and Gus live, so the drive was a tad long and hot. Jake and I passed the time by playing a version of the alphabet game, which managed to entertain us for the majority of the ride.
“Don’t miss out on the scenery,” Bev called out jokingly. The barren red landscape changed minimally over the course of the trip.
However, as we got closer to Sedona, our surroundings did become more appealing. Large rock formations grew from the ground and stretched up towards the sky. We gained over 4,000 feet in elevation during our drive.
The temperature in Sedona was 10 degrees cooler than it was in Sun City. When I first learned this, I thought it would provide a great relief after days 100-plus degree weather. However, upon arrival, I realized that 10 degrees does not feel all that different when the temperature is still over 90 degrees.
All of us in Coyote Canyon – from left to right: Dad, Jake, me, Bev, Gus, and Mom
We ate a quick lunch and then walked to Pink Adventure Tours. Bev had signed us up for a Coyote Canyons Pink Jeep Tour, one of the moderate (which means not too bumpy) canyon drives. After receiving our bubblegum pink wristbands, we walked to the parking lot where there were multiple bright pink jeeps lined up beside one another. Our tour guide, Ryan, has been working for Pink Jeep Tours for 12 years, since the economic crash in 2008. He grew up in California, where he had worked in carpentry. When he lost his job, his parents suggested he turn his hobbies of Jeep driving and dirt bike-riding into a career, so he moved to Arizona and got the job he has now. The unfortunate thing, he said, was that, after spending so many of his days driving through the canyons, his hobbies no longer felt like fun past times. He just sold his last dirt bike a few weeks ago.
Ryan was a fantastic tour guide. He gave us the perfect blend of information and humor to make the tour fun and educational. It was a bumpy ride – the jeep tires, which were over half my height, climbed over boulders and down treacherous rocky trails, throwing us against our tightened seat belts. There were quite a few times that I held my breath, expecting the vehicle to tip, but Ryan was an expert driver who kept us safe.
As we rode, we admired the layers of red, white and brown on the canyon walls, formed over hundreds of years of different environments. Ryan stopped the jeep near an old, log cabin built by Earl Van Deren for him and his new bride in the 1890s. Walking up to that house, sweat pouring down my face, I could not imagine how anyone survived that long ago without air conditioning.
The Van Deren cabin
The jeep tour lasted two hours, but it felt much shorter. The good news is that, while it was fascinating and the views were beautiful, I don’t think any of us wanted the tour to last much longer. By the end, our pants were soaked with sweat as if we had been swimming, and we were all tired and thirsty from the heat.
We stopped at the gift shop for some souvenirs and then headed to Old Town Cottonwood, a small town not far from Sedona. The main street was quaint and alluring, but most of the shops were closed due to the novel coronavirus. Instead of walking the street, we went to Colt Grill, where we bought drinks to cool off. Bev and I each ordered a glass of wine, Gus and Dad ordered local beers, and Mom ordered a prickly pear margarita, one of the house specials.
Just before purchasing, a kind man seated at the bar announced that he would pay for our drinks. This was exceedingly generous considering how many of us there were. We thanked him profusely, but he shrugged us off. He told us he hated the racial tensions happening in the country right now, and he wanted to show us that there were no ill feelings between any of us.
Now, with our heads light on our shoulders from such a pleasant interaction (and the alcohol in our systems), we headed to where we wanted to eat. Rock Springs Cafe, which happens to be the oldest, independently owned restaurant still serving customers in Arizona, was one of very few buildings situated on a small exit off the highway. It consisted of a Mom and Pop-style store, a saloon, and the cafe, which was where the restaurant dining was located. The cuisine was homestyle comfort food, which, of course, wasn’t fancy, but it was delicious and filling after a long day. Our waitress was as sweet as the pies she served us. We ordered a rhubarb strawberry pie and a Jack Daniels pecan pie to bring home and enjoy with ice cream.
When we finally did arrive back at the house, Gus pointed out that we had been on our adventure for 11 hours, which explained the drawn looks on our reddened faces. The pie, however, brightened our spirits immediately. We sat at the table, laughing, talking and, once again, savoring the beauty of finally being able to spend time with one another.
Drinking at Colt Grill – from left to right: Bev, Gus, Mom, me, Jake, and Dad
This trip has been almost entirely about visiting family, which I could not be happier about. After about a decade since I have seen my relatives, it has been a true blessing to be reunited with them once again. Today, however, it was fun to experience Arizona for the amazing place that it is, to eat at a restaurant that only the locals know, and to travel a little out of our comfort zones to have a new experience we will never forget.
Even on relaxing vacations, it can’t hurt to have just a little taste of adventure sprinkled in.
My family having lunch at Pam’s & Rick’s house – from left to right: Dad, me, Mom, Kathleen, Pam, Samuel, Gus, Thomas, Bev, Jake, Isabella, and Steve
Today, I started my morning far earlier than my body wanted. The heat in Sun City becomes unbearable by 7:00am, so we had to start running as soon as the sun rose.
Dad and I mapped our route to end at Starbucks, and afterwards we each enjoyed our first cup of espresso since the trip began. After four days of very little sleep, my body needed that boost of caffeine.
Getting up so early gave us the luxury of relaxing for the rest of the morning. We sipped and enjoyed our coffees on the veranda outside until it was too hot to sit, and then we sat in the air conditioned living room. Bev and Gus had locally grown grapefruits, and even though they are strictly not allowed by my current low-FODMAP diet, I couldn’t help but taste a small bite. The citrus fruit burst inside my mouth, yielding a delightfully tart juice that was the perfect balance between bitter and sweet.
At noon, we left to go to Pam’s house. Pam is Bev’s eldest daughter. She lives in Fountain Hills, an hour away from Sun City. On the way, we chatted with Bev and Gus and shared stories and pictures from our latest life adventures. The hour flew by. Sooner than I realized, we were arriving at the mansion-sized homes situated on the sides of canyons, overlooking red rocks and the valley far below.
Pam is a beautiful soul. There are some people who just seem to understand life at a different level. They are humble, loving and giving to no end. They are the kind of people you can spend hours with without even realizing the passage of time, and when you do leave, you feel better about yourself and inspired to love others well. This is the kind of person Pam is. She was an incredible hostess, and despite the fact that I had never met her before, she greeted me with love and treated me as if I was her own daughter. At the end of our visit, she hugged me tightly and requested I return any time I needed a place to sleep.
While at Pam’s house, we spent time with her and her husband, Rick, as we savored our last moments with Steve and the kids. From here, we would part ways – Steve and the kids would return home while we drove back to Bev’s and Gus’ house. We talked and shared a commemorative last meal together. The hours ran away from us quicker than we could chase them, and before we knew it, it was time to say goodbye.
Uncle Steve and Mom just before saying goodbye
It was hard to say farewell not knowing when I would see them again. Before this trip, I had not visited Steve in eight years; the kids had truly been children and toddlers, and I had been a mere freshman in high school. Now, those “kids” are almost full grown, and I have graduated from college, started a career, and gotten engaged. So much has happened since we last visited, and so much could happen before we see one another again. In another eight years, even the youngest will be a legal adult and I will be in my thirties.
I hugged each of my relatives, requesting that, this time, we wouldn’t wait as long until we saw each other again. Thomas seemed the most upset by the separation; he gave me at least five earnest hugs, assuring me each time that he would come to visit me in Maryland next year. I really do hope that we can make that happen.
After Steve and the kids left, we said goodbye to Pam and Rick and began the drive home. It was a somber mood in the car. Luckily, we had a sermon Pam recommended to distract us. The message was focused on kindness, and it used the movie “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood” to lead its trajectory.
Playing cards a few days ago at Steve’s house – from left to right: Sam, Kathleen, me, Thomas, Mom, and Jake
Kindness truly is what makes life beautiful. Mr. Rogers said the way to become successful in life is to be kind, and I think that must be true. I have never felt more fulfilled than after a day when I believed I truly did some good in this world, when I had been kind to others. The message reminded us that we should never so busy in our lives that we don’t realize or recognize when other people need help, and that we should extend kindness to all, even those who do not give it back to us. So many of us think of kindness as conditional; if someone is kind to one of us, we are kind back. But the beauty of true love – of God’s love – is that it is unconditional; there is nothing someone has to do to earn it, and, even more importantly, there is nothing someone can do to get rid of it. As Christ’s followers, we are called to love like that.
When we arrived home, the bittersweet taste had not left us. After such a long day and with another early morning ahead of us, we went to bed early. Lying in the guest bedroom, I couldn’t help but think back over the last few days of our trip.
It’s the finitude of moments in life that makes them both sweet and bitter. I can’t help but feel sad when wonderful moments come to an end. But endings are truly beautiful. Without them, we would not appreciate the time we have. Endings bring closure to long-awaited journeys and hope for an unknown future. Endings are what remind us to make the most of the moments we are in, and they are what make memories so precious.
Eating dinner our first night at Steve’s house – from left to right: Thomas, Jake, me, Samuel, Kathleen, Mom, and Dad
The sermon today and the interactions I had with my family members also reminded me what makes endings a little sweet rather than only bitter. After all, there certainly are endings that leave us with only a bitter taste in our mouths. What gives moments meaning is the kindness exchanged within them. Love makes life worth living.
The best way to make the most of the moment I am in is to focus on being kind to those around me. When I am that devoted to being kind and cognizant of others’ needs, it helps me to remember to be present with those around me. So, when those moments end and it is time to say goodbye, the farewell is not nearly as bitter because I have made so many fond memories with those I love.
The most beautiful thing about today’s ending is that I know it is not final. While I am not sure when I will see these family members again, I do know that we will be reunited someday. The beauty of today’s ending is that, while this chapter has come to a close, the story is not yet finished.
