“Life’s most persistent and urgent question is, ‘What are you doing for others?'” –Martin Luther King, Jr.
Last week, I shared about how important it is to take care of yourself. This week, we are going to talk about the importance of serving others.
We all play a part in making our world a better place. Every day, our actions affect those around us. It is up to us whether these people are impacted in a positive or negative way.
When many people think of service, they think of building homes in impoverished communities or volunteering at a soup kitchen. But there are small things you can do every day in your life to help others, and many of them take minimal effort, if any. Giving someone a compliment, smiling at passerby, or letting someone merge in front of in you in traffic are all examples of random acts of kindness that give other people hope and encouragement.
I think we can all agree that the world right now is hurting even more than usual, and we can all use a pick-me-up because of it. Start the chain of kindness by committing to doing one random act of kindness a day. These can be grand gestures, like paying for someone’s bill at a restaurant, or as simple as holding the door for someone. If you need inspiration, check out the free printable below – it has a different random act of kindness every day so you are constantly challenging yourself to have new experiences and serve your community in new ways.
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It seems like the novel coronavirus is not going anywhere soon, so we have all been tasked with finding ways to navigate this “new normal.” For travel enthusiasts, like me, that can be a difficult task considering the amount of risk and restriction associated with travel. Airports are practically a breeding ground for the virus, and every country and state has different mandates about how and when people are allowed to visit.
It is recommended to stay at home as much as possible unless travel is essential, but sometimes, we all need to step outside of our homes for our own mental health. If that’s you, consider using these tips to keep your travels as safe as possible.
1. Do your research
Research your own state’s laws and the laws of the state or country you are planning to travel to. Know what the restrictions are and what is required of you, such as having an extended quarantine when you arrive at your destination or after you return home. If you can limit your travel to within your own state, that’s even safer, and it can be more realistic if you can’t take the time off to quarantine from your job.
2. Wear a mask
Joseph and me on a main street in Leesburg, Virginia, where we were visiting Joseph’s sister, Jo, and her husband, Dan
Whether your state or the place you are visiting requires it, wear a mask. The most recent research shows that this protects not only the people around you, but yourself as well. Make sure the mask you are wearing is approved by the CDC, and please wear it over your mouth and nose. Both your mouth and nose lead to your respiratory system, so there is absolutely no point in leaving your nose exposed.
If you can, avoid international travel or travel to faraway states that requires a plane ride. Airports pose a much larger risk of contracting and spreading the virus than your own vehicle. If you can stay within your own state, even better. But if you want to travel out-of-state, consider the idea of road tripping there. The great part of this is driving to your destination enables you to see more of the scenery and to stop at other places along the way that seem fun or interesting. Make a road trip playlist (or use mine below) to listen to some entertaining tunes along the way.
4. Keep your hands as clean as possible
Wash your hands frequently, and keep a bottle of hand sanitizer in your car for times when you can’t. Keeping your hands clean dramatically reduces your chance to contracting and spreading the virus. And remember, even when you think your hands are clean, do NOT touch your face!
5. Stay away from other people as much as possible
If you are traveling simply to get out of the house, consider alternatives to hotel stays and popular tourist attractions. Hiking, fishing, and other outdoor activities are great alternatives to walking busy streets. Consider packing your own food or getting takeout rather than dining at a restaurant. And while the weather is still warm, camping can be a more affordable and safer alternative to hotel stays.
Traveling to other places is fun, but it only seems worth it when you really get to experience those places. The good news is that the tourist attractions are often not the best way to achieve this – the best way to experience a place is to go where the locals go. So, again, do your research. Make a list of the places you want to visit and things you want to do that are low-risk, such as visiting national parks, scenic points, local eateries that are offering carry-out, and main streets in small towns.
7. Get tested for COVID-19 when you come home
Whether your state recommends it or not, a safe step you can take at the end of your trip is getting tested for COVID-19 as soon as you return and quarantining until you get the results. Waiting to interact with other people until you know you’re safe can help prevent the spreading of the virus to dozens of people. It’s always better to be safe than sorry, so if you are willing to take the risk of traveling, consider making sure that you are the only one who experiences any potential consequences of that choice.
Traveling can be a great way to take care of your mental health and get active in your daily life, but during times like this, it should always be done with caution and forethought. Don’t stop living life, but make sure when you do embark on any adventures, you are doing so safely for yourself and others.
The majority of our day in Arizona was uneventful. Everyone in the house seemed to be tired after the late night we had yesterday, so we decided to have a lazy day. We watched Hamilton and played games, and a couple of us even decided to enjoy an afternoon nap.
In the evening, Steve, Isabella, Kathleen, my mom, and I sat around the table to play cards. Dad retired to bed early, and Jake headed upstairs with Samuel and Thomas to play Mario Kart. Hours passed as we laughed and drank, determined to make the most of our last evening together in Tucson.
Near the end of the game, Thomas and Samuel came bounding down the stairs, followed by Jake, who was holding his right leg awkwardly in front of him as he hopped on his left foot.
“I was bitten by a scorpion,” he announced. A beat of silence followed this statement before all of us at the table stood.
“You were what,” Mom demanded.
“Bitten by a scorpion,” Jake repeated. He, ironically, seemed to be the calmest person in the room.
“Where?” Steve asked.
“In one of the bedrooms,” Jake said. “We were playing hide-and-seek.”
“He’s probably gone by now,” Steve said. Despite this, he still followed Jake back upstairs to the bedroom. A moment later we could hear the stomping of a heavy shoe, the sound that told us the scorpion had been both found and killed.
Mom ran out of the room to wake Dad, while I turned to the two girls.
“Get me some gauze and something sturdy to make a tourniquet,” I said. They both ran out of the room as I grabbed my phone to call 911. This, however, went out of my head as soon as Jake came back into the room. He rushed to his backpack, tore it open, and pulled out a military style belt, which he wrapped tightly around his upper leg.
“It says to do a cold compress and to keep the area elevated,” Kathleen said as she returned, reading off her phone. Isabella followed her and set the gauze I had asked for on the table.
“Tyler,” my mom called as she ran back into the room. “You’re driving.”
“I can’t drive,” I exclaimed.
“You need to,” she said. This, I realized a moment later, was true. Of all the adults present, I was the most sober.
Steve thankfully remembered to call 911 as I left the room to grab the car keys. I went to start the car, but after waiting for a few moments, I realized my family was not following. I ran back inside.
“Jake, you are going to cut off circulation to your leg,” I heard my mom say. “Loosen it up a bit.”
“No,” I exclaimed, rushing into the room. “That’s what a tourniquet is supposed to do.” Jake was lying on the couch, his foot elevated on my dad’s shoulder.
“How do you feel,” I asked him.
“It hurts,” he said to me with a smile. His jovial attitude reassured me. Steve walked into the room saying it was recommended we take Jake to the hospital. We helped Jake hop to the car, where I returned to my spot in the driver’s seat.
Luckily, I had drank very little, and we arrived at the hospital 20 minutes later. I dropped Jake off at the Emergency Room with our parents and then parked the car. Jake’s last request to me as he hobbled out was to keep his girlfriend, Jess, updated. I reassured him that I would, so the first thing I did in that hospital waiting room was send her a text of what I knew.
My parents and I waited in silence. A few minutes ticked by before the doctor emerged.
“He is going to be fine,” she said. “I gave him an ice pack, and we are going to monitor him to make sure he doesn’t have a reaction.”
“How long will that take,” my mom asked.
“At least an hour,” she said. “Also, unfortunately, because of COVID, you all can’t wait here. You can wait in your car, or you can go home, and he can call you when he is ready.”
We walked out of the hospital, each a little torn on what to do. When we got back in the car, my dad asked my mom if she wanted to stay or go.
“I guess we can go back to the house,” she said. I, personally, wanted to stay in the parking lot. I knew if it had been me in that room, it would be reassuring to know that my family members were so close by. But I reversed the car and drove out of the parking lot.
As we were driving back, Mom received a call from Steve. She relayed to him what the doctor had told us, and then she said that she was going to drop off me and Dad at the house and then return to the hospital. When she got off of the phone, there was a short pause before I spoke.
“I didn’t know you were planning on dropping us off at the house,” I said.
“Neither did I,” Dad said.
“If I had known, I would have just stayed at the hospital,” I said. “I don’t want to just wait at home.”
“Yeah, you’re not going back to the hospital alone,” Dad said. The bit of composure Mom had held onto until this point finally left her, and she broke down in tears.
“Then you make the decision, David,” she said. “I don’t want to make it.”
“Okay, let’s go back to the house,” Dad said, thinking practically. “It’s only 20 minutes away and we are already almost there. And when Jake calls, we will go straight back.” Mom agreed, but her tears only intensified. I checked the GPS and saw we were halfway between the house and hospital. With a deep breath, I pulled over the car onto a side road.
“This isn’t your turn,” Mom said.
“I know,” I replied. I parked the car and then turned to her.
“What do you want to do?” I asked. Mom didn’t answer me. “I think we should go back,” I said.
“You should ask your dad,” Mom said.
“It’s not about what I want,” Dad said. “It’s about what you want. What do you want to do?” Mom didn’t answer.
“Okay,” I said, putting the car back into drive. “We’re going back to the hospital. That’s clearly what you want to do. It’s what we all want to do.” I turned the car around and headed back down the highway. A few moments of silence passed before Mom spoke.
“Thank you,” she said quietly. At this moment, Dad’s phone began to ring. It was good that we turned around when we did because it was Jake calling – the hospital needed insurance information.
I drove back to the emergency room entrance, and Dad left the car. Through the windows, I could see Jake standing with a nurse in the waiting room.
“That’s Jake,” Mom exclaimed tearfully. “He’s standing up! That must mean he’s okay and he’s ready to come home, right?” She turned to me, her eyes hopeful and desperate, as if confirmation of this question was the lifeline she needed.
“I don’t know,” I told her. Mom bit her lip and looked back out the windshield, and then she rushed out of the car to greet her son, who was exiting the hospital. The two of them returned with Dad to the car.
My family. From left to right, Jake, Jess, Dad, me, and Mom
Jake was still in high spirits. On the ride home, he finally told us the full story: He had run into Steve’s bedroom during a game of hide-and-seek. The scorpion had been hiding right in the shadows behind the doorway. Jake said the sting had not hurt as bad as he would have thought. At first, he thought maybe it was a splinter. Then, after looking at it, he saw the area was red and swollen, so he thought maybe he had stepped on a bee. He used his phone flashlight to see what he had stepped on, and that’s when he saw the small, spider-like creature.
He did tell us it is actually not a good idea to use a tourniquet when stung or bit by a venomous animal.
“I knew it,” Mom exclaimed. The doctors had told Jake that using a tourniquet restricts all the venom in a high consistency to one area, so when the tourniquet is taken off, they have no way of controlling the venom spread into the rest of the body. It is better to elevate the bitten or stung area and let the venom seep slowly, in a more controlled state, through the bloodstream.
We returned to the house, where Jake’s main concern was where the scorpion was now. To his immense disappointment, Steve told him it had been flushed down the toilet. He had wanted to keep it, or at least get a picture, as a souvenir of his experience.
What do you do when someone you love is hurt? It’s difficult to know what to do, and everyone reacts differently. Some of us are overwhelmed by our own empathy and emotions; no one likes seeing someone they love in pain. Others become cool headed and practical, thinking only of the logical next step. Some become rooted to the spot, paralyzed with fear, while others snap into action as if they have been training for this for years. The interesting thing is there is no way to predict how you will react until you are in the situation; there is no way to prepare for the swarm of nauseating emotions or rush of adrenaline that will hit you. And the unfortunate thing is that you are most likely to make mistakes or do something unhelpful, such as recommending a tourniquet for a wound that shouldn’t have it, or being so overwhelmed by choices to make that you become too petrified to make any decision for fear it will be wrong.
Me and my brother
What we can’t do is let these mistakes and shortcomings dismay us. After all, having made these errors means we did do the most important thing anyone can for someone in pain: We were there. We were present with the person who was hurting, and we did what we could and what we knew how to do. I am so grateful for each of my family members and the different skills they brought to the table, and I am especially appreciative for the doctors who knew what Jake actually needed.
And now that I am out of the situation and can finally think about how I feel, I am so very grateful that my brother is safe and healthy. His good sense of humor, kind disposition, and relaxed approach to life are always things I have admired and loved, and I could not imagine my life without my younger brother.
What do you do when someone you love is hurt? Hopefully, you just get the chance to be there with them.
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Since the beginning of the novel coronavirus and stay-at-home order, date nights went from going out to dinner and a movie on a Friday night to cooking a nice meal at home and watching Netflix. At first, this was a welcome, intimate change, but after a while, the creativity seemed to run out. You can only eat the same meal and watch the same movie so many times before it starts to get old.
I have a solution for you. It’s still dinner and a movie, but with fun, inventive spin.
I love having themed date nights, when the activities, food, drinks, and movie all fit together for one entertaining experience. My latest themed night was based on the Disney Pixar film, Ratatouille.
It is a fun, family-friendly movie that’s perfect for a family movie night, or for just a chill night with your significant other. The biggest plus for this movie is that it is definitely going to make you feel hungry, which is perfect because this date night is filled with lots of food.
I hope you enjoy! If you try out this date night for yourself, please let me know how it goes. I would love to hear about your experience, and if you added any fun ideas of your own.
Drinks
As a little sneak preview to the night ahead, I made café au lait. This is a French coffee recipe that uses equal parts coffee and steamed milk. The recipe is just below.
I also recommend picking up a nice French wine, such as a tasty bottle of champagne or a Bordeaux to pair with dinner or dessert.
Café au Lait
Makes: 2 servings
Ingredients:
1 cup strong brewed coffee
1 cup steamed milk (see Notes)
sweetener of choice, to taste (see Notes)
Directions:
Steam milk with desired amount of sweetener.
Pour hot coffee into a mug and top with milk. Sprinkle with cinnamon, if desired.
Notes:
The best way I have found to steam any kind of milk (without a fancy milk steamer) is the following: Place milk in a food processor or blender and pulse for 30 seconds, or until the milk is frothy. Pour into a mug and heat in the microwave for 30 to 45 seconds (until hot but not deflated). This yields the perfect consistency and temperature. It works best for whole milk, but any type of milk will still gain body through this process.
I personally like to drink my coffee dark, but Joseph likes a little sweetener. What I have found works best is to put the sugar right into the milk before pouring it into the food processor. It helps add even more body to the milk, and it gently sweetens the coffee without being too over-powering.
Music
No date night is complete without a proper musical selection. I really enjoyed the French Cafe Lounge playlist on Spotify. Joseph and I listened to it while we made dinner, which lead to much more dancing than cooking (which, I have to admit, was really the goal all along).
Activity
Well, this would be cooking, of course! You have it easy tonight. Get in the kitchen together to make all of your dishes. The dessert is “build-your-own” style, so it is even more fun for everyone to get their aprons on and spend time in the kitchen together.
If this seems too simple, I recommend adding in a little extra dancing with your significant other. It’s incredible how just a little music can completely change the ambiance in the room. With the music playing in the background and each of us gazing into each other’s eyes, the kitchen turned into a delightful little café on the streets of Paris in moments.
Food
This is the fun part.
For dinner, the choice was obvious: Ratatouille. I am currently on a low-FODMAP diet, so I used the recipe from Wholesome Yum for inspiration, but tweaked the ingredients slightly to fit my diet. If you are free from any low-FODMAP restraints, feel free to head over to the Wholesome Yum website to follow that recipe. Otherwise, look below for my little notes and edits.
Low-FODMAP Ratatouille
Makes: 2 generous servings, or 4 to 6 smaller side dish-sized servings
Ingredients:
For the sauce:
1 14.5oz can no-salt-added diced tomatoes, drained
1 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil
1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
1 tsp Herbs de Provence (see Notes)
2 tbsp fresh basil
1/4 tsp sea salt, or to taste
For the vegetables:
3 medium roma tomatoes, sliced
2 medium (about 12oz) zucchini, sliced
1 small (about 1 pound) eggplant, sliced (see Notes)
1 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil
1/4 tsp sea salt
1/8 tsp ground black pepper
Directions:
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.
Combine all the sauce ingredients in the bowl of a blender or food processor. Puree until smooth. Add salt and pepper, to taste.
Spread the sauce in a thin layer in a 1.5-quart round or oval casserole dish.
Arrange tomatoes, zucchini and eggplant in a spiral, alternating them. Drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with sea salt and black pepper.
Bake for 30 to 35 minutes, or until the vegetables are tender and the sauce is bubbly at the edges.
Notes:
Herbs de Provence is a blend of thyme, basil, rosemary, tarragon, savory, marjoram, oregano, and bay leaf. We did not currently have this in our cupboard, but what we did have was Italian seasoning, which is a blend of basil, oregano, rosemary, thyme, sage, and coriander (if you are on a low-FODMAP diet, check your Italian seasoning blend closely – some like to sneak in a little garlic). So, we used Italian seasoning and marjoram, and it turned out fine.
Eggplants tend to be much bigger than zucchini and tomatoes, so you may need to cut your slices into halves or quarters to make them similar in size. My eggplant was rather small, so I was able to leave my slices whole.
For a little extra protein, we ate some shrimp with our ratatouille, but truly, the ratatouille was our main dish.
We paused the movie halfway through to eat dessert. I chose to do crepes. I also considered making macarons, but they are rather finicky to make. So, I decided to do something a little easier and more interactive for anyone who is not the main baker.
It may surprise you, but most crepe recipes are a little heavy in the carbs. Because they are so thin, I thought they would be healthier than pancakes, but no such luck occurred. So, I searched for a healthy crepe recipe and fell in love with the one posted on A Sweet Pea Chef. It is tasty and light, which is exactly what everyone wants their crepe to be.
Feel free to head over to A Sweet Pea Chef for the original recipe, or look below for a low-FODMAP version with my personal notes.
Low-FODMAP Crepes
Makes: 2 to 4 servings
Ingredients:
2 large eggs
1/2 cup milk of choice (I like to use unsweetened almond milk)
1/4 cup water
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tbsp 100% pure maple syrup (not pancake syrup)
1/4 cup gluten-free flour blend (I used King Arthur Flour’s all-purpose gluten-free flour blend)
fillings and/or toppings of choice (see Notes)
Directions:
In a large mixing bowl, whisk together all the ingredients.
Heat a small skillet over medium-high heat and lightly grease with cooking spray.
Ladle about 1/4-cup of the batter into the skillet and gently rotate the pan to spread it evenly over the base of the skillet (the thickness should be similar to that of a tortilla).
Cook on low to medium heat, flipping as needed until cooked (see Notes).
Place the cooked crepe on a plate, add your favorite fillings, and fold or roll up. Add toppings of choice.
Notes:
There are so many delicious ways to fill and top crepes. I chose a traditional French version – I folded my crepes and then squeezed lemon juice on top and sprinkled them with powdered sugar. Joseph went for the more American version, with chocolate chips, powdered sugar and peanut butter. Other delicious filling and topping ideas include fresh fruit (such as berries or banana slices), Nutella, or whipped cream. Feel free to get creative with whatever you have in your pantry!
I always find that when I am making crepes, the first few are a disaster. When I was making these, I tried to flip them as little as possible. I waited until the last possible second, when it was starting to get rather brown, and then flipped the crepe, and they turned out perfectly. The crepes I flipped sooner were under-done in the middle and fell apart. It may take a few tries to get yours just right, but don’t worry! Ugly crepes are still delicious crepes.
Movie
At the end of your date, or just after dinner to strengthen your appetite for dessert, snuggle up on the couch and turn on the cartoon favorite, Ratatouille. It’s a fun way to end your French-themed day, and the movie is surprisingly moving at any age.
I had forgotten how amazing it felt to sleep in a bed. I woke up huddled in blankets, my head gently rested on a pillow, my body cuddled by the mattress. For the first time in over a week, I felt well-rested, and I started my day without any aches and pains.
Joseph and I both showered to take advantage of the luxury of indoor plumbing while we still had it. Then we packed up our belongings and returned to our road trip lifestyle as if the last 18 hours of lavish comfort had never happened.
Our plan for today was to spend the entire day in the city we had been most excited to visit – Denver. Before we left, I searched for the best coffee shops in the area. We chose to go to Huckleberry Roasters (Huck), even though the reviews said it was pricey, because, with its two U.S. Roaster Championship awards, it is supposed to be one of the best places to get coffee in the country. The cafe, like last night’s restaurant, was somewhere we never would have found had we not been looking for it. It was outside of downtown Denver, just on the outskirts of a neighborhood. The storefront had a brightly painted mural that attracted the eye, but never would I have known by the appearance that it was supposedly the best coffee in the city. Joseph and I each ordered an iced latte and sat at a picnic table in front of the store.
All our expectations were met. The coffee was a tad over-priced – six dollars for a latte is a bit much – but it was the best we had ever tasted. The milk was steamed to a silky perfection that blended smoothly with the richness of the espresso. Satisfied, we headed to City Park for a late morning walk while we sipped on our coffee.
It was hotter than we expected. As we walked around the park, sweat poured down my forehead and pooled in the crease of my elbow that was bent to hold my drink. All we managed was a short stroll before deciding to head downtown, hoping the shops would at least provide some air conditioned relief.
Our first mission in the city was to find a restroom, which was a lot more difficult than I thought it would be. Denver began to lose its magic after thirty minutes of searching without any luck. We finally stumbled along some public restrooms in the downtown mall, but we needed a code to unlock the doors. To obtain this code, we had to purchase an item from a local shop; then the cashier would reveal the secret numbers to us.
At this point, we were both losing patience. Luckily, someone exiting the men’s bathroom held the door open for Joseph, and just as I was about to give up, a friendly custodian, who must have seen the desperation in my eyes, unlocked the women’s bathroom door for me.
By now, Joseph and I were hungry for lunch, so we sat on a bench in the mall and ate the picnic we had packed. Once our stomachs were full, we began to peruse the shops.
Last night, driving through Denver, I had felt that magnetic energy I had experienced last summer. Gazing up at the lights, I was enamored once again by the dynamism of the city set against the beautiful backdrop of distant mountains. But today, amid the current climate of the pandemic and recent riots, Denver revealed itself to be a city like any other. We were approached by people desperate for money, and people far too high to remember why they approached us. Many of the shops were closed, some temporarily and others permanently, including the bookstore I had fallen in love with last summer, where two locals had written personalized poem just for me. Glass windows of shops had been boarded up and graffitied. The hashtag GEORGEFLOYD appeared everywhere, from spray-painted murals to electronic billboards flashing down at us.
Despite how separated we have felt during this trip from the tragedies and challenges of the last few months, we have not escaped the troubling lives we left behind. In less than a week, we will be back in Maryland, and I am sure our lives will go back to the way they were before. Nothing will have changed.
My only hope is that we will come back changed. I hope we return to our lives more compassionate, more worldly, more empathetic than when we left. I hope we will have more perspective about the current state of affairs in this country, and perhaps that will help us to know better how we can serve those around us. The reality is that the world around us has not changed, but that does not mean we cannot bring change to our personal realities.
When we reached the end of the 16th street mall, we sat on the steps of a closed store to rest and figure out where we wanted to go next. To our immense disappointment, we discovered the fireworks scheduled for tonight were cancelled. Just in the last week, Denver decided not to encourage any more crowds than were already congregating. Our original plan was to see the fireworks tonight as a finale to our trip in Colorado, and then we would take our time driving back to Maryland. However, we decided it was more important for us to see the fireworks in this state than to spread out the driving time during our trip back.
So, sitting on those steps in the heart of Denver, we decided to extend our time in Colorado by two more days, and we began to plan which attractions we wanted to add to the trip. We found a fireworks show in Salida (which is, ironically, where I saw the fireworks a year ago), so we based our itinerary on that.
We headed back to the car, nervous but excited about our new plan. The first thing that needed to happen to make this extended trip work was we needed to buy more food. There was enough to fuel us for a few days of driving, but not for days of hiking and other, more strenuous activities. We stopped by a Walmart on our way to Colorado Springs to pick up food and finally reach a resolution to another important journey we have been on: the hunt for low-FODMAP ice cream.
I have been craving ice cream since this trip began, and I reached my breaking point last night after dinner. We had stopped at gas stations, supermarkets, and ice cream shops last night and earlier today, but we had not had any luck. However, in the frozen section of Walmart, we found one, small ice cream bar that I could eat. Bolstered by this, we drove to the same Bass Pro parking lot we had stayed at a few days ago, where we hurriedly made dinner. As another treat for ourselves, we had bought a small bag of shrimp to eat with the rice we had packed for the trip. It was a nice change from the canned tuna and chicken we have been eating for days.
By the time we ate the ice cream, it had melted to the consistency of a milkshake, but it was still just as tasty as it would have been frozen.
Joseph set up his hammock while I prepared the back of the car for me to sleep. The night spent in a bed seemed like a distant memory. But, as I laid down to rest, I couldn’t help but think of how privileged I am. I, too, have struggled during this pandemic because of my compromised immune system and a lack of work, but I have been blessed with an incredible support system that has helped make sure I have been taken care of. I am not wanting for anything. And while some people are worrying about food, illness, and riots, I am on a road trip in one of the most beautiful states in America with my fiancé. While some people are facing challenges simply because of the color of their skin, I am on the adventure of a lifetime with a beautiful ring and a future full of opportunity waiting for me when I return home.
The world has not changed. I realize that this road trip is a blessing, that all of the inconveniences, difficulties, and challenges we have faced during it are nothing in comparison to what many people face in their daily lives. I know that the challenges I have always faced in my life, from being a woman, from struggling with chronic illness since the age of 10, from simply being human, cannot compare to what other people have experienced.
But I have changed on this trip. Even in these short 11 days, I have grown and matured, and I have gained new perspectives of this world around me. I have learned more about myself and others, and I have grown stronger. I am ready to return home and find where I belong to do good in this world. There is so much in me that I am ready to share; this blog is just a start.
Yesterday was not the quintessential Colorado morning I was expecting, and I can’t say this morning was either. There is something strange about waking up in a tent in the middle of the woods, listening to the gentle mooing of cows. But the cool morning air and the mountains in the distance are a step in the right direction.
Joseph and I packed up our campsite and drove to Mesa Verde for an early morning hike. Unfortunately, most of the trails were closed because of COVID-19 or the fire hazard. We found one loop trail that was supposed to lead us around the canyons and give a spectacular view of the cave dwellings, but halfway through, we came up to a sign that prohibited us from going any farther. Disappointed, we turned around and walked back the way we came.
Despite this, the view was still astounding. From a distance, we looked out over the canyons to the homes carved into the rock. People are truly incredible. I can only imagine what it would have been like to build and live in those homes, with the risk of falling down the side of the canyon always a real possibility and living in a tight community where everyone worked together. As far as society has come since then, I can’t help but wonder if we have lost something.
When we returned to the car, we ate a quick breakfast and then headed to a nearby gas station. The tire pressure warning light in the car has been repeatedly appearing, despite Joseph filling the tires with air daily. When he checked the tire pressure today, the amount of air in the front left tire was alarmingly low.
“I just filled it last night,” Joseph said. “There must be a hole.”
So, in addition to the failing breaks, damaged rotors, and cracked windshield, we now have a hole in one of our tires. Because of the amount of driving we plan on doing tomorrow, we decided it best to get the tire, along with the breaks and rotors, fixed today. Luckily, our next stop was the main street in Telluride, so we planned to drop the car off in the town while we walked around.
While Joseph filled the tires with air to get us to our next destination, I went into the store to buy ice for our cooler. The bags of ice I saw in the freezer all looked a little too big, so I went to the cashier, a small woman with long brown hair and impeccable eyebrows, to ask if there were any other sizes available.
“No, just the eight pound bag,” she told me. “Do you have a small cooler?”
“Yeah, I just don’t think it will fit,” I said.
“Would you want half a bag,” she asked.
“Actually, yes, that would be great.”
“I have a small cooler and I do the same thing for me,” she said. “And I won’t charge you for it.”
“Oh, really,” I asked. “That’s very kind of you. Thank you.” The cashier shrugged it off.
“Oh, it’s no problem,” she said. “The full bag is only four dollars, so there’s really no point in charging you. Just give me a minute.” She tended to other customers waiting in line, and then she went into the back room, grabbed a fresh bag, and shoveled ice into it from a machine. After thanking her again, I excitedly presented the gift to Joseph, and then we were on our way to our next destination.
It was almost a two hour drive to Telluride, but after sitting in the car for days, the trip flew by as if we were just driving down the block. We stopped a few minutes outside of the main town to drop off our car at Telluride Tire and Auto Service. The owner, Stuart, told Joseph that it would be about an hour, so instead of going into town, he recommended a scenic spot where we could eat lunch. Joseph and I packed some food, and we walked a short distance to a nearby baseball field adjacent to a clear, blue lake. We sat on one of the benches and gazed up at the snow-capped mountains just a few miles away.
When we arrived back at the auto shop, we enjoyed a cup of complimentary coffee while waiting to be seen. When Stuart was ready, he delivered both good and bad news: The leak in our tire was fixed, but our brakes were not capable of bringing us safely home. He himself did not have the parts to fix them, but he asked where we were headed and then personally called mechanics in that area for us to find out who had the parts and could work on our car first thing tomorrow morning.
I am not sure we would have had any luck had we not had Stuart’s help. He had personal relationships with the owners and managers of each of the places he called, so we were able to get an appointment with a trusted mechanic when the shop opened tomorrow. And once securing us with that appointment after nearly half an hour of calling other shops, he told us that he was not going to charge us for the tire plug, nor the hour of labor he put in to fix it. We were stunned by his generosity and thanked him profusely, but he shrugged us off just as the cashier did earlier today. He said that his shop fixes tires for free for people passing through all the time.
“I believe in karma,” he said. “Years ago, my wife was driving to Oregon, and her water pump broke in Idaho. A farmer pulled over on the side of the road and told her that his son had an auto shop. He took her there and fixed her pump for free. I have never forgotten that.”
We thanked Stuart again, and then we left to continue our drive into Telluride. We passed through the main town, searching for what we were most excited about: The gondola ride. We continued down the windy road until it ended, sure at this point that we were driving in the wrong direction. However, the mountains ahead kept us going. We parked and took a few minutes just to take in the beauty of the giants towering above us. A waterfall cascaded down the side of the rock, and beside it, just like in Disney and Pixar’s “Up,” was a house sitting on top of the mountain.
As we drove back toward Telluride’s main street, Joseph spotted the gondola cables stretching up the side of the mountain. We parked in Telluride, and while Joseph paid, I ran to save our spot in line, which stretched down the sidewalk from the entrance. Luckily, the line moved quickly, and soon we were in our own little compartment, floating into the sky, watching the shops and homes grow smaller beneath us. The gondola climbed through tall white trees and over trails that wound down the mountainside, where people were biking. At the top, Joseph and I stared at the mountains in awe. This was the Colorado we had been dreaming of seeing.
We exited the gondola at the mountain market, a small town that had the feel of an amusement park main square. Despite the fact that people actually did live on the ski resort, the way the buildings were designed to match and connect with one another made it almost seem like a facade. I kept waiting for the people in costume to come out dancing.
We dipped into a couple of shops, including one filled with animal photographs, paintings, and figurines created from of rope, wire and beads. An older woman with a foreign accent I couldn’t quite identify sat behind a desk at the front of the shop, books filled with photographs of African animals in front of her. She informed us that everything in the shop was created in South Africa, and all of the proceeds were used to help save the elephants and rhinos.
Elephants are my favorite animal, so obviously I couldn’t stop myself from supporting this cause. I selected a small, beaded, elephant figurine who was in mid-trumpet. The woman behind the desk informed us that she was from South Africa, and she worked with Peace Parks Foundation, an organization that fights to keep the animals in Africa safe. She works particularly with elephants and rhinos.
“Did you know that 57 percent of the world’s species are extinct, and that happened in just the last forty years,” she asked us. “We need young people like you to help. If you have the chance to put a signature on something, sign it. And if you can volunteer, do it. It’s not easy work, but once you go to Africa, you aren’t ever going to want to come back.”
The view of the mountain market from the gondola
She grabbed a documentary off a nearby stack of DVDs, peeled the price tag off of it, and handed it to me.
“This is for you to watch,” she said. “It’s not pretty, but it’s factual, and it’s important.” I promised her I would watch it, and Joseph and I left with moods slightly dampened but adventures still to have for the day. I will have to research more about Peace Parks later. I have always wanted to go to South Africa, but circumstance has kept me here in the United States. However, perhaps I can find other ways to help support this cause.
Joseph and I rode the gondola back to the main street of Telluride to explore those shops. We bought some Belgian chocolate to enjoy for dessert and another post card to commemorate our experience. Then we returned to our car to start the drive to Black Canyon.
By now, it was getting to late, but we were determined to do at least a short hike in the canyons before the sun set. Just twenty minutes away from our destination, we stopped at a Walmart to pick up a few essentials. As we stepped out of the car, I gazed out at the black clouds in the distance and inquired about the weather.
“I was thinking about that, too,” Joseph said. “But I checked the weather and it said it is supposed to be clear all night.” We went into the store to pick up food and super glue for the crack in the windshield. As we approached the checkout, Joseph received a text from his mom, asking about how the weather was and where we were located. We bought our supplies and then headed to the doors, where we stopped in shock. In the short time that we had been in the store, the world had gone dark and the trees were bent sideways from the power of the wind.
We hurried to the car, where we checked the weather on our phones again, but the app still said the it was supposed to be clear all night. We decided to head to Black Canyon to see if the weather blew over, and if not, we would head straight to the campsite.
By the time we arrived at the national park, the weather seemed to have calmed. The wind was still heavy, but the skies had cleared a bit. The air had cooled considerably, so we put on jackets and sweatpants and headed to the trail. But just as we started the trek into the canyons, the rain began to pour down on us. We ran back to the car, where we watched lightning streak down the sky in the distance.
Still not wanting to miss our chance to visit the canyon, we decided to wait again. In fifteen minutes, the weather had cleared, but now we were twenty minutes away from sunset. With the agreement to be careful but to move as quickly as possible, we grabbed our rain jackets and hurried back to the trail.
I am so glad we decided to go. The temperature had warmed again, so we ended up shedding our layers within the first half mile. And the view was incredible. I thought I had completely tired from seeing canyons, but I found this view more magnificent than when I visited the Grand Canyon last year. The canyons plunged deep into the earth, teeming with trees and wildlife. And just as we were finishing the trail, the sun dropped behind the trees and lit up the sky like fire. I have never seen a more incredible sunset in my life.
As always, the picture does not do it justice – the sunset was absolutely breathtaking in person
Our campsite was just a few minutes away, so we made it there just before dark. The road was a little rough, and there was not enough space to set up our tent, but it was too late to try another campsite. While I made salads for dinner, Joseph cleared out the back seat, and then we ate in the woods. Joseph hung his hammock between our car and the trees so he could sleep beneath the stars, but I wanted protection from the wind and mosquitos, so I slept in the car.
As I fell asleep, I thought back to all the incredible people we met today. From brief encounters with kind townspeople, to the cashier who gave us a free bag of ice, to the man who fixed our tire for free and helped us to stay on track with our journey, to the woman who has dedicated her life to saving endangered species, we experienced the true gift of kindness and generosity throughout our day. And our experience would not have been the same without it. It’s curious to me that, just this morning, I was pondering if society had lost something since the time when we lived in close quarters in cave dwellings to our comfortable homes today. Then it seemed that every interaction I had today was created to remind me that simply wasn’t true. The spirit of human cooperation and benevolence has not been lost. The challenge now is to be willing to focus on the goodness of people, and to challenge ourselves to extend that kindness to others as well.
Since the first date with Joseph, my new fiancé, we have talked about our shared dream of going to Colorado.
At the first mention, he had been there before, first for a skiing trip and then once more driving through the state on a road trip. I had not yet had the chance of visiting, but I had always dreamed of going. That following summer, on a cross country running journey, I found myself falling in love with the majestic mountain ranges. Strolling through Denver, I knew this needed to be a place I returned to one day. I had no way of knowing it would be so soon.
During our impromptu staycation last week, Joseph proposed to me that we take a road trip to Colorado. It was just a musing at first, but then, we both grew more serious about the idea. Because of the novel coronavirus, neither of us are working our regular jobs right now, and his graduate school classes don’t start for another month. When again would we have a chance like this?
I agreed, not knowing that Joseph had even more in mind for this trip. On the last day of our staycation, he bent down on one knee and asked me to marry him. Our Colorado trip suddenly became not just a summer road trip, but the celebration of our engagement.
We had a week to plan, which was not much considering we had to pack all of our food (I am currently on a very strict diet for my health, so fast food is, unfortunately, not an option), and we wanted to stay within a tight budget.
Despite this, everything came together this morning. With the car packed full with food, sleeping bags, extra blankets, clothes, and our tent, we bid my parents farewell and embarked on our first long driving day just shortly after sunrise.
The first few hours driving into Western Maryland were reminiscent of the road trip we had taken during our staycation just last week, the day Joseph had proposed the Colorado road trip idea. When we crossed the border into West Virginia, what we were doing became real to both us, and our excitement only grew.
We stopped in a Panera parking lot at lunch so I could have reliable wifi for a video call for work. We sat on the curb eating sandwiches and making bitter instant coffee that neither of us wanted to drink.
That’s when the first misadventure happened. The power box we bought blew the circuit in the cigarette lighter, so we were stuck figuring out how we were going to charge my laptop during this trip. We scanned desperately through Amazon, but found that most of the chargers we needed to replace it (if we could even get them), would be a hundred dollars at the least.
Without much hope, we stopped by a Walmart nearby. We perused the laptop section without any luck. As a last effort, we went to the automotive section, where we found a USB-A to USB-C lightning cable for three dollars! We eagerly ran back to the car to test it out, and to our delight, it worked. Crisis number one was successfully averted.
We continued our drive through West Virginia, marveling at the scenery and listening to music. I found a Pinterest steal this morning about making a playlist to create a soundtrack for your life, and we both had fun picking songs for that and sharing our selections with one another.
Kentucky was our final destination for today’s travels. We stopped in a Cabela’s parking lot, our “campsite” for the night, just as it was starting to drizzle. Fighting against time, we rushed to light our portable grill and heat up our turkey burgers for dinner. We jumped in the car just as the rain was starting to pour. The burgers weren’t quite warm; unfortunately, they were about the same temperature as the salad we ate it with (which was also not at its ideal temperature after sitting in the cooler all day). But after such a long day, it felt like a five-star meal.
We’re in the car now, the seats pushed down into the floor and our sleeping bags laid out on top for a bit of cushioning. It’s hot and humid, but Joseph had the genius idea of securing a tarp to the side of the car so we could roll down a window. Now, there’s at least a cool breeze blanketing us. The sound of the rain pattering against the car windows is going to be a soothing lullaby for our first night on the road. Honestly, after sixteen hours of being on-the-go, I don’t think anything could keep me awake at this point.
