Travel

Arizona vacation: Day 7

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It was another hot morning in Arizona. After being here for a week, I thought my body would be used to it, but every time I step out of the house, it still seems to come as a surprise. The heat is relentless, and the sun seems to be trying as hard is it can to sear every living thing, including me. 

I woke up early again today to go running before the sun rose too high in the sky. The one thing I will admit about the dry Arizona heat is that it’s better running weather than the humidity in Maryland. Here, I can keep my stride going well into the 90s, but back home, anything over 80 degrees is too hot – I start sweating as soon as I step outside. I have enjoyed my runs here  more than those I was having back on the east coast during our latest heat wave. 

Dad and I finished our run a little after 7:00 and bought coffees once again at Starbucks. It is becoming a bit of an expensive tradition, but nothing compares to that little jolt of espresso after a hot morning run. 

Today was our last full day in Arizona, and we planned to spend it as we had the rest of this trip – visiting and getting to know family. Before relatives arrived at the house, Bev and Gus took us shopping at a local store to buy souvenirs, and then they gave us a small tour around their retirement community. My favorite part was the garden, which included a meditation area with a fountain and a large model train adorned with cute little houses, moving figurines, and a zoo (which, oddly enough, housed a dinosaur). The tour took place from the inside of our air conditioned car because today was the hottest day we had experienced yet. I am surprised the thermometer did not break. It was over 110 degrees by the time we got back to the house to prepare lunch. 

Annette, my mother’s cousin, was the first to visit. We ate hors d’oeuvres and talked about our summers – Annette just recently retired from being a nurse and bought a new home not far from where Bev and Gus live. I have only met Annette one other time in my life, so it was nice to have the chance to catch up and visit again.

After she left, we only had an hour before our next guests arrived. Jocelyn, Pam’s daughter, and her new boyfriend, Riley, were out of town when visited Pam’s house on Sunday, so they decided to drive to see us on our last evening here. They brought Hazel, Jocelyn’s energetic, two-year-old dog, who brought smiles to all of our faces with her kisses and puppy cuddles. 

Once again, I was excited about the chance to visit with family I had never met before. Jocelyn and I found that we have a lot in common, including the fact that we are both currently on the low-FODMAP diet. For the first time on this trip, I was not the only one with unusual dietary restrictions. Riley, Jocelyn and I talked about school and their recent trip to California. The two of them will be returning to school in a few weeks for their second year of college. It was nice to be able to talk with family members so close in age and with whom I had so much in common; we were able to talk about our lives with ease.

From left to right: Annette, Gus and Mom

The evening hours flew by, and before we knew it, our dinner plates had been cleared, dessert had been served, and it was time to say goodnight. Once again, we faced saying farewell to people without knowing when we would see them again. Then we went to bed knowing we would have to do the same with Bev and Gus tomorrow, which, after days of growing to know them better and love them even more, would be even harder.

I have one more night in Arizona. I will have one more early morning run, one more hot latte, one more breakfast with family, and then I will be flying on a plane back to Maryland. The trip went by far too fast. I would love to have the chance to stay just a few days longer to explore more of Arizona and spend more time with these people I have grown to love even more. I am so grateful that, despite with everything currently happening in the country and the world, this trip was still possible. For much of the summer, I feared we would not even make it to Arizona. And now that I have been here, I know it’s going to be even harder to stay away.

It will not be another decade before I return. I am going to visit again soon, but this time, I am going with experience, which means I am not coming back in July. A pleasant, winter trip to a balmy 70 degrees sounds like a delightful vacation that I am thoroughly looking forward to. 

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Arizona vacation: Day 5

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My family having lunch at Pam’s & Rick’s house – from left to right: Dad, me, Mom, Kathleen, Pam, Samuel, Gus, Thomas, Bev, Jake, Isabella, and Steve

Today, I started my morning far earlier than my body wanted. The heat in Sun City becomes unbearable by 7:00am, so we had to start running as soon as the sun rose. 

Dad and I mapped our route to end at Starbucks, and afterwards we each enjoyed our first cup of espresso since the trip began. After four days of very little sleep, my body needed that boost of caffeine.

Getting up so early gave us the luxury of relaxing for the rest of the morning. We sipped and enjoyed our coffees on the veranda outside until it was too hot to sit, and then we sat in the air conditioned living room. Bev and Gus had locally grown grapefruits, and even though they are strictly not allowed by my current low-FODMAP diet, I couldn’t help but taste a small bite. The citrus fruit burst inside my mouth, yielding a delightfully tart juice that was the perfect balance between bitter and sweet. 

At noon, we left to go to Pam’s house. Pam is Bev’s eldest daughter. She lives in Fountain Hills, an hour away from Sun City. On the way, we chatted with Bev and Gus and shared stories and pictures from our latest life adventures. The hour flew by. Sooner than I realized, we were arriving at the mansion-sized homes situated on the sides of canyons, overlooking red rocks and the valley far below. 

Pam is a beautiful soul. There are some people who just seem to understand life at a different level. They are humble, loving and giving to no end. They are the kind of people you can spend hours with without even realizing the passage of time, and when you do leave, you feel better about yourself and inspired to love others well. This is the kind of person Pam is. She was an incredible hostess, and despite the fact that I had never met her before, she greeted me with love and treated me as if I was her own daughter. At the end of our visit, she hugged me tightly and requested I return any time I needed a place to sleep. 

While at Pam’s house, we spent time with her and her husband, Rick, as we savored our last moments with Steve and the kids. From here, we would part ways – Steve and the kids would return home while we drove back to Bev’s and Gus’ house. We talked and shared a commemorative last meal together. The hours ran away from us quicker than we could chase them, and before we knew it, it was time to say goodbye. 

Uncle Steve and Mom just before saying goodbye

It was hard to say farewell not knowing when I would see them again. Before this trip, I had not visited Steve in eight years; the kids had truly been children and toddlers, and I had been a mere freshman in high school. Now, those “kids” are almost full grown, and I have graduated from college, started a career, and gotten engaged. So much has happened since we last visited, and so much could happen before we see one another again. In another eight years, even the youngest will be a legal adult and I will be in my thirties. 

I hugged each of my relatives, requesting that, this time, we wouldn’t wait as long until we saw each other again. Thomas seemed the most upset by the separation; he gave me at least five earnest hugs, assuring me each time that he would come to visit me in Maryland next year. I really do hope that we can make that happen. 

After Steve and the kids left, we said goodbye to Pam and Rick and began the drive home. It was a somber mood in the car. Luckily, we had a sermon Pam recommended to distract us. The message was focused on kindness, and it used the movie “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood” to lead its trajectory. 

Playing cards a few days ago at Steve’s house – from left to right: Sam, Kathleen, me, Thomas, Mom, and Jake

Kindness truly is what makes life beautiful. Mr. Rogers said the way to become successful in life is to be kind, and I think that must be true. I have never felt more fulfilled than after a day when I believed I truly did some good in this world, when I had been kind to others. The message reminded us that we should never so busy in our lives that we don’t realize or recognize when other people need help, and that we should extend kindness to all, even those who do not give it back to us. So many of us think of kindness as conditional; if someone is kind to one of us, we are kind back. But the beauty of true love – of God’s love – is that it is unconditional; there is nothing someone has to do to earn it, and, even more importantly, there is nothing someone can do to get rid of it. As Christ’s followers, we are called to love like that.

When we arrived home, the bittersweet taste had not left us. After such a long day and with another early morning ahead of us, we went to bed early. Lying in the guest bedroom, I couldn’t help but think back over the last few days of our trip.

It’s the finitude of moments in life that makes them both sweet and bitter. I can’t help but feel sad when wonderful moments come to an end. But endings are truly beautiful. Without them, we would not appreciate the time we have. Endings bring closure to long-awaited journeys and hope for an unknown future. Endings are what remind us to make the most of the moments we are in, and they are what make memories so precious. 

Eating dinner our first night at Steve’s house – from left to right: Thomas, Jake, me, Samuel, Kathleen, Mom, and Dad

The sermon today and the interactions I had with my family members also reminded me what makes endings a little sweet rather than only bitter. After all, there certainly are endings that leave us with only a bitter taste in our mouths. What gives moments meaning is the kindness exchanged within them. Love makes life worth living. 

The best way to make the most of the moment I am in is to focus on being kind to those around me. When I am that devoted to being kind and cognizant of others’ needs, it helps me to remember to be present with those around me. So, when those moments end and it is time to say goodbye, the farewell is not nearly as bitter because I have made so many fond memories with those I love. 

The most beautiful thing about today’s ending is that I know it is not final. While I am not sure when I will see these family members again, I do know that we will be reunited someday. The beauty of today’s ending is that, while this chapter has come to a close, the story is not yet finished.

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Arizona Vacation: Day 1

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The first day of my vacation started with waking to the sound of pounding feet on a treadmill at 3a.m. I grudgingly slid out of my bed and exited my bedroom to see my dad completing his morning run before our long day ahead. We had to leave for our flight by 6:30. I yawned and headed upstairs to get ready. This day was getting an even earlier start than I had expected, but the excitement of what was ahead kept me from returning to my bed.

I got ready and went outside while the world was still dark for my own run. With a light belt around my waist and the flashlight on my phone leading the way, I jogged up and down my driveway, waking my tired muscles for the long trip ahead. The sky was just beginning to lighten as I headed back inside to shower.

My family and I packed our suitcases into the car and then headed to BWI airport. Jess, my brother’s girlfriend, dropped us off with a cheerful farewell, and then we headed to baggage claim. 

Walking into the airport was like walking onto the set of an apocalyptic movie. Instead of milling with people, the lines were short with people spacing themselves out at least six feet apart. Everyone was wearing a mask. It was very different from my memories of this same airport from a year ago when I had flown to San Francisco for 4K for Cancer.

We checked our bags in record time, which meant that all the extra time we had allotted ourselves by arriving to the airport early was now just an extra two hours to kill before our plane departed. My family got pretzels from Auntie Anne’s while I bought a latte from Starbucks and a banana from Pinkberry Yogurt. I walked around the airport to stretch my legs while I still could, sipping my latte and talking to Joseph on the phone. I am missing my favorite travel buddy and photographer on this trip, who also happens to be my fiancé. 

We boarded our plane at 10:30a.m., and soon we were soaring high in the sky. My family and I nodded off, already exhausted by our day. By this point, I had already been awake for eight hours, but our travels had only just begun.

Four hours later, we arrived in Denver for our layover. My mother, while comparing prices, had forgotten to check what our layover would be, which meant we accidentally got stuck with a four hour wait between flights. We ate lunch, and then Mom and I walked around the airport, window shopping. The Denver airport is the most entertaining airport I have ever been in. There were tons of shops to walk into, including a book store that caught my attention for a while. In the center of the airport is a large display of an airplane flying over platforms that have been decorated to look like ruins. The airport is filled with art exhibits to admire and enjoy, which made our walk much more entertaining than expected.

Our flight was scheduled to begin boarding at 4:35p.m. We seated ourselves at the gate at 4:00 to make sure we would have enough time. However, 4:35 came and went without any announcements. At 4:45, the gate attendant announced that they were beginning pre-boarding for the flight to Houston. My mother and I looked up at each other at the same time, our eyebrows knit in confusion. My mother stood and walked away to talk to an employee, and then she rushed back to us. 

“We’re at the wrong gate,” she said. “Come on!” We gathered our belongings quickly and ran across the entire length of the airport. The gate where we were supposed to be (a different gate than what had been listed on our boarding passes) was completely empty. We rushed up to the gate attendant, who announced that the flight was fully boarded.

“I’m guessing you are the Didra family,” he said, making a few clicks on his computer. We confirmed this, and then, to our relief, he re-opened the gate for us. We rushed onto the plane, and less than two minutes later, we were once again lifting off into the sky above. 

After nearly a four hour layover, we still almost missed our flight. 

I spent the flight reading my book, Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness by Susannah Cahalan. It is a memoir that tells the story of a journalist from New York City who lost a month of her life due to some form of disease that took over her mind. It was so captivating that, before I knew it, we were landing in Tucson, Arizona. 

The airport was desolate when we arrived. All of the shops were closed and apart from our fellow passengers, the terminals were empty. We picked up our luggage in record time and rented a car to drive to where my uncle, Steve, and his children, Isabella, Kathleen, Sam, and Thomas live. As soon as we started driving, we passed a cactus that towered far above me, and I couldn’t help but laugh at the irony. It was as if the landscape wanted to assure me that we were, in fact, now in the desert.

We arrived to a beautiful spread of food and a warm home. I have not seen my family in Arizona for over eight years. The kids I played with when I was a freshman in high school are now nearly grown. 

We all sat around the dinner table, catching up, playing games, and enjoying one another’s company. I wanted to stay up later, but after being awake for 22 hours and flying over 2,000 miles, I was falling asleep sitting in my chair. 

Luckily, I have a week here to reunite, reconnect and reminisce. Tonight, it is time for some much-needed rest.

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Colorado road trip: Day 14

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When I woke up, the world around me was still dark. The car had grown cold in the last few hours. I snuggled deeper into my sleeping bag, wondering how much longer I had to rest.

Just then, the alarm on my phone began to blare. A small, internal grown escaped me. I shut off my alarm and allowed my head to fall back into my pillow, exhausted. Four o’clock had arrived far too early.

I pulled myself out of my sleeping bag as Joseph rolled out of his hammock. We cleaned up our campsite in silence and drove to a nearby gas station to get ready. 

Our first and only stop today was Monarch Crest Trail at the Continental Divide, the site where mountains separate the rivers that flow into the Pacific Ocean from those that flow into the Atlantic Ocean. The sun was just starting to rise as we began hiking up the steep incline of the trail. We watched the light touch the tops of trees and the mountain peaks. The moon, which we have watched grow throughout our trip, sat just above the mountains in the distance, finally full and bright. 

“Tyler, I have a feeling this just might be one of the best views we have ever seen,” Joseph said. 

We were looking for a particular point Troy, a fellow hiker, had told us about yesterday. However, after three miles of walking, we still had not found it. We knew we must have taken a wrong turn, but today was the day we were supposed to begin our long drive back to Maryland, so we did not have time to search for it. I suggested we return to the car, but Joseph, who had a vision of the view he wanted to see, insisted we continue a little farther. After another half mile, it became apparent that we were not going to reach the top of the summit anytime soon, at least not by any conventional means. 

The thing is, Joseph has never lead me on a conventional hike. When it became apparent there was not enough time to get to the point we wanted, Joseph turned instead off of the trail and straight up the mountainside. I followed him up towards the summit, scrambling over rocks and grass, my legs and lungs burning from the exertion. The mountainside was steep and the elevation was increasing rapidly. It felt as if there was not even enough air to sip on.

Just before I thought I would not be able to go any farther, the land began to level. Before I knew it, we were at the top. 

The view was breathtaking, both literally and metaphorically. It was by far the best view we had seen during our entire trip in Colorado. Mist gathered beneath the peaks that stretched up towards the blushing morning sky. The pine trees basked in the bright sun’s glow while quarts crystals glistened beneath our feat. We were surrounded by land left nearly untouched by human hands, free to fully express its beauty without any constraints, and it was stunningly magnificent. 

I could have spent hours at the top of that mountain, drinking in the arresting view. However, Joseph and I both knew our time in Colorado had finally come to an end. We had already extended our original trip, but this view was more than worth the time spent getting here. This was the epic Colorado finale that we never could have planned. 

We stumbled back down the side of the mountain to the marked trail. I checked my watch, and I was dismayed to see that it was already the time we wanted to get back to our car, which we were currently 3.5-miles away from. Not wanting to waste any more time, Joseph and I both broke into a run.

Luckily, the trek up the mountain was far more difficult than the trip down. We sidestepped rocks and skidded down the dirt, letting the clean Colorado air fill our lungs and souls.

Just before reaching the bottom of the mountain, we met up with a group of bikers just beginning their journey. They asked us about our hike and how far we went. The entire trail is 13 miles, which we, unfortunately, did not have enough time to traverse today. We told them about the incredible view we did see, and our failed plan to start driving back to Maryland this morning at 7:30.

“Oh, I don’t think you’re going to make it,” one biker joked, glancing at his watch. The time was 8:15.

“Oh, really, I think we can do it,” I replied back with a laugh.

“Hey, we’re all Christians,” one biker said to the group. “Do you all mind if I pray before we get started?”

“Oh, wow, we’re Christians, too,” Joseph said. “Do you mind if we join you?” 

So, we gathered with the bikers in a circle, our heads bowed and eyes closed. The biker who had invited us all to prayer spoke, thanking God for this opportunity for people from all over the world to gather in this place to appreciate His beautiful creation. I felt tears brimming in my eyes as I felt the love of God surge through that group of people, all from different places with different backgrounds, gathered in a place indicative of the magnificence of His handiwork. 

The moment was over almost as quickly as it began. The bikers said goodbye and began their journey up the mountain as Joseph and I finished running down. We ate a quick breakfast at the car, bought a postcard and sticker to remember our experience, and then began our long drive. 

Joseph drove the first four hours. We stopped at a gas station to fuel our car and our bodies, and then I drove the next few hours to another rest stop, where we bought coffee. We decided then to make another stop for dinner, and then to drive late so we could make as much progress toward our final destination as possible. While we drove, we sang along to our favorite songs, listened to podcasts, called family members, and began talking more about future nuptial plans. All the while, a sense of bittersweet contentment filled us. We are on our way home.

The last two weeks have been amazing, but every good thing must come to an end. We are tired and ready for real showers, comfortable beds, and good coffee we don’t have to pay an hour’s wages for. But we also know that returning home means the end to an incredible adventure and returning to lives where we live hours apart and have other responsibilities competing for our time and attention.

However, it’s the finitude of moments in life like this that makes them sweet. There is beauty in endings. I have learned so much about myself and my relationship with Joseph during this trip, and I am ready to use that knowledge in my everyday life. This is the end of one chapter, but it also the beginning of a new adventure that I am just as excited for.

Until then, I have two days left in the car to soak up every last moment of this journey. 

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