Honeymoon West Coast trip: Monterey & San Francisco (Day 6)

September 6, 2021 1 Comment

Me with the jellyfish at the Monterey Bay Aquarium

Do you ever have a day that starts out so good it’s almost too good to be true, & then something happens to make you realize it is, in fact, too good to be true? Today was like that.

Joseph & I decided to sleep in a little to take advantage of our one morning that we didn’t have anywhere to be early in the day. It was a misty, cloudy morning in Monterey, which meant there was no point in getting to the 17-mile-drive early to see the sunrise. Instead, we left our Airbnb around 8:30 & drove 20 minutes to the start of the drive.

The 17-mile-drive is a scenic drive that features forest views & the coastline in Pebble Beach, California. It was created in 1881 & was first traversed in horse & buggy.

I am always struck when I go to national parks & other places how interesting it is that someone found this land, claimed it, & said they wanted to share it with everyone, but then charged them to get in. But, nevertheless, I always hand over the money. I just cannot resist the chance to see any part of this beautiful world.

Joseph taking videos on the 17-mile-drive – vlog to come soon!!

The trail wound through neighborhoods & trees before finally following along the restless coastline. The ocean was feisty the morning of our drive, splashing up against the rocks with such force that the resulting wind smacked our faces & blew back our hair & clothes as soon as we stepped out of the truck. A dense smoke hung low in the air, most likely from the wildfires raging not too far away, & all you could hear for miles was the sound of crashing waves.

Our next stop was the Monterey Bay Aquarium, one of the spots I was most looking forward to. I am happy to report it did not disappoint. The aquarium, which was located right on the edge of the bay, was filled with exhibits that stretched from the floor to the ceiling, brimming with colorful sea creatures & tall stalks of seaweed that swayed in invisible currents. The aquarium had done an excellent job of recreating the sea creatures’ natural environment. The exhibit rooms were dark, leaving an eery blue light from the water that drifted into the space. Standing in front of the enormous tanks, realizing how large the animals in the depths of the ocean actually are, was a truly humbling experience. We are so small in this world, & there is so much more to this life & creation than we are even aware.

As much as we enjoyed watching the fish swim around, Joseph & I also appreciated how friendly the staff was. As soon as we walked in, the woman who greeted us noticed our face masks (white & black that say bride & groom, respectively) & asked if we were on our honeymoon. When we confirmed that we are, she immediately announced that we needed celebration buttons & asked us which sea creature from a selection that we liked best. We chose the octopus & sea turtle, on which she wrote “Just Married” on the corresponding pins & drew little party hats on the animals. It was such a simple gesture, but being given those pins to wear as we walked around the aquarium made us feel like appreciated guests & customers. And she was not the only staff member who made our experience better. From the friendly man at the front door who gave us our instructions for the day, to the conversational cashier who asked us about our honeymoon & talked to us about her dream to visit the East Coast, to the worker who was hurrying in his work day but still stopped to congratulate us. As amazing as the aquarium was, the staff truly made it an unforgettable experience that I would recommend to anyone.

I could have happily spent the day watching the otters play & jellyfish drift, we had to leave to drive to San Francisco for our evening’s activities. We ate lunch at the truck & then drove to our Airbnb, where we dropped off our belongings before heading into the city.

With all of the wedding & honeymoon excitement, we had forgotten is was Labor Day weekend. San Francisco is normally packed with people already, but thanks to a Giants baseball game & the holiday weekend, it was easily double the normal amount of crowds. This meant parking was even more difficult than it usually is, & we easily spent 30 minutes just looking for a space. We finally found an open spot where someone had left a full drink cup sitting – I suppose no one wanted to touch it or knock it over. When we checked the price, we were dismayed to see that the hourly rate was no longer available. Instead, for special holiday parking, there was a flat rate of $50 no matter how long your stay was. Unwilling to look for parking again & running out of time, we forked over the money & rushed into the busy San Francisco streets.

We had reservations to tour Alcatraz, but before the sky grew too dark, I wanted to see the sea lions. At Pier 39, sea lions famously gather on the pier, much to the delight of onlookers at the nearby restaurant. We ran to the pier & spent a few minutes watching & laughing as the sea lions barked at one another & flopped around the deck before resting their heads on one to rest. Then, we ran back up the street to the boat ramp for Alcatraz.

Alcatraz Island (Photo by Shelby Cohron on Unsplash)

The wait was a little long, but we passed the time chatting & people watching. When the time for boarding came, we excitedly found seats on the top of the ferry so we could watch the island grow closer.

Alcatraz, I learned, was not just the prison for infamous criminals, but also for pacifists who tried to avoid the draft Civil War. Because they were supposed to be in the military, they were tried & punished as military members in defiance of the United States government, which means the punishments were stricter & resulted in stints spent in Alcatraz. And after the prison closed, Native Americans attempted to claim the land because they were allowed to reside on any surplus land. To avoid this, the United States turned it into a national park, which it still remains to this day.

The Native American & imprisoned pacifists situation wasn’t the only one that struck an uncomfortable cord. Alcatraz was operating until the 1960s, when many social movements gained traction, one of them being the movement to reform inmates rather than give lifetime punishments for all crimes. This means that, until that time, many things happened in Alcatraz that social justice leaders today would be infuriated by.

It was a little creepy walking around the old cells where inmates spent years of their lives, shut off from the world & spending most of their time alone in spaces small enough to be a closet today. The chill from the outdoors seeped in through the walls, making me wonder just how cold it got for inmates on the island.

Because of COVID-19, the audio tour was given entirely on individual devices that we carried with us for the tour. The devices gave us directions on where to stand & turn, & the story was told by voice actors, creating an immersive experience.

At the end of the tour, Joseph & I returned our audio devices & looked at the clock. To our delight, we had finished the tour in just one hour & could catch the earlier ferry. By now, we had not eaten in eight hours & we were growing hungrier by the minute.

We raced down the 13 stories from the top of Alcatraz to the bottom of the hill it was situated on. By now, the line for the ferry had already grown long, & we stood nervously hoping there would be room for us on board. San Francisco is almost always misty & chilly, but on Alcatraz Island, it was even colder, windier & wetter.

The line began to move as boarding began, & we waited with bated breath as we inched closer to the boat. 100 people away…80 people away…50 people away…the line began slowing down…35 people away…people began holding up their fingers in the air to signal how many people were in their party, & the crewman slowly selected the lucky ones who got to board…25 people away…people were becoming more earnest now, pushing their way forward…20 people away…the crewman apologized & closed the gate. We were stuck on the island for another hour, waiting in line.

Our stomachs fell with disappointment as the boat sailed away. Hungry, tired & now cold, we sat on the concrete, stuck where we were until the boat returned for us. As the minutes ticked by, our moods soured. We were not dressed appropriately for a night on Alcatraz, & as we sat, shivering, my fingers slowing grew numb. We watched TikTok videos to pass the time, our empty stomachs setting our teeth on edge as we waited.

When the boat returned, we stood quickly, the crowd pressing in on all sides. Everyone wanted to get on the ferry as quickly as possible. To our dismay, we spent another 20 minutes in the cold, teeth chattering & body’s shaking, as the crewmen completed their necessary chores on the boat & gathered everyone from the island – this was the last ferry of the evening.

When we were finally allowed back on the boat, all the charm of the day had left our minds. All we could think about was how hungry, tired & cold we were. We called the restaurant we planned on eating at, & to our dismay discovered we needed vaccination cards to dine inside, not just there, but at every restaurant in San Francisco. I had my card with me, but Joseph, unfortunately, had left his card in his backpack, which was currently in our bedroom at the Airbnb.

View of Golden Gate Bridge from Alcatraz (Photo by Eric Ward on Unsplash)

When we got to the island, we rushed back to our car. The last bit of my positive attitude left as, in my hurry to get in the truck, I knocked over the sticky, sweet-smelling drink that had been left sitting in our parking space & spilled it over my new boots.

With short & tense language, we tried to find a new restaurant, but anyone who would take us was already closed because of the late hour. We finally resolved to order takeout from the restaurant we had originally planned on & take it back to our Airbnb, but when we called, we discovered takeout could only be ordered by visiting the restaurant in-person & sitting at the bar. Left without any options, Joseph drove me as close to the restaurant as he could, & then returned to our original parking space to await my phone call.

I sat at the bar quickly & told the bartender I was ready to order, but he insisted I wait & look at the menu. So I sat, annoyingly drumming my fingers until he returned, & I gave him the order I had memorized in the truck.

The restaurant was busy, so I was surprised & grateful when our food arrived just 15 minutes later. I called Joseph & rushed back outside. He picked me up from the curb, & while driving, I fed us both bread to slowly fill our stomachs & hopefully boost our morale.

We arrived back at our Airbnb & quickly changed into warm clothes. Joseph grabbed us some wine from our bags, & I set up a spot to eat in our room. We sat together, hoping to salvage the evening, but conversation failed us, other than the occasional dumfounded question: “What just happened?”

The food was rich & hit our empty stomachs wrong. Neither of us finished. We laid back in bed, knees pulled up to our stomachs in pain, feeling dejected & exhausted from the long day.

Here’s the funny thing about this whole story: Up until the last few hours, our day had been bliss. We started it with lovely views of the coast, & then had some of the best hours on our honeymoon yet wandering around the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Our Airbnb host was lovely. We got to pet her dogs, & she promised us a complimentary breakfast with homemade muffins for the following morning. We had the chance to see the cute sea lions in San Francisco. We did the Alcatraz tour, which wasn’t our favorite experience, but we would have regretted not going, wondering if we missed something. And here we were, in a cozy room with food from the restaurant we wanted to visit. We had let this one experience completely cloud our vision from everything else that we enjoyed today.

It’s difficult to center yourself when something goes wrong & remember how much good there is in the world. Today, I was reminded of the importance to not let one unfortunate event ruin an entire day, & certainly not to let one bad day, month, year, or however long it is (I’m thinking about you, COVID-19) convince me that it’s a bad life. There is so much in this world & in every day to be grateful for, even on the days I have to look a little harder to find it.

Travel

Honeymoon West Coast trip: Santa Barbara, Solvang, Bixby Bridge, & Carmel-by-the-Sea (Day 5)

September 5, 2021 No Comments

No matter how well you plan for a trip, the one thing you can always count on is that something will not go according to plan.

Joseph & I had planned on taking a ferry ride to Channel Islands National Park today at 8a.m. It was going to be a short trip – the only two options for a ferry ride back to the shore were 10a.m. & 4p.m., & we couldn’t afford a full day spent on the island. The plan was to run around the loop trail as fast as we could, take in the views, & get back to the ferry in time to return to shore. However, as risky this plan was from the beginning, it became utterly hopeless when we received a phone call from Island Packers Cruises yesterday asking if we wanted to change our reservation to a 4:00p.m. return time because all we had essentially booked was a boat ride. By the time the ferry actually docked on the shore, we would only have a maximum of thirty minutes on the island, if we were lucky, before we had to board once again.

Joseph & I both agreed that we would rather take in the sights another way. So, late last night, Joseph looked up the best hikes in Santa Barbara & chose one that immediately masked our disappointment of not going to an island – we would be going to a hot springs instead.

We woke up early in the morning & drove just 10 minutes away to the trailhead. Instead of going straight to the springs, we decided to take a long, loop hike up a mountain that would take us back to the hot springs on our way down.

The hike was exhausting, but the views were more than worth it. The mountains in the distance were painted against the sky in all different shades of blue, creating an artistic ombre effect. From our lofty perch, we could see the entirety of the town below us, as well as the undulating waves of the Pacific Ocean.

The first thing I noticed as we skidded back down the side of the mountain was that the air around us had grown warm. A moment later, I heard the gentle tinkling of falling water droplets. Less than a minute later, we broke through the trees to reveal misty pools of water stair stepped down the side of the mountain, steam rising off of the surface.

We pulled off our hiking shirts & shorts, revealing the bathing suits we had worn underneath, & slipped into the serene water. The water was so hot that, at first, it stung our skin. I am quite sure it was hotter than any hot tub I have ever soaked in. But our bodies soon acclimated, & we were able to lean against the slimy rocks & relax. There was an odd smell of rotting eggs in the air, which I realized after a moment was from the sulfur compounds that not only give hot springs their many health benefits, but also their characteristic eggy smell.

When our bodies felt warm & loose & we were adequately rested, we pulled ourselves out of the water & trekked down the final 1 1/2 miles down the mountain. We were both hungry at this point from our morning’s adventures, so we hopped into the truck & drove 45 minutes to Solvang.

Walking around Solvang was like stepping into a fairytale. Danish-style homes & windmills lined the streets, & inside each of these structures were local businesses selling items like wooden shoes, sweet candy, & first edition books by Hans Christian Andersen, the pages still intact but yellowed & the covers beginning to peel from the years of storytelling.

Our first stop was Succulent Cafe for lunch. Joseph finally ordered the burger he had been craving this entire trip, & I ordered the roasted eggplant, which came with fresh bread from a local bakery. The eggplant was served in a rich marinara sauce mixed with olives, capers & roasted mixed vegetables. It was a tad salty for my taste, but still delicious.

After eating, we decided to stroll around town & do some window shopping. While we did, we passed by multiple wineries (we were, after all, in the heart of wine country). We decided we would be remiss not to buy a local bottle, & we dipped into one store that happened to be in the oldest building in the town.

Crawford Family Wines is a family-owned winery committed to using only the very best fruits in the country in the making of every bottle of wine. We ordered the tasting with cheese, which came with a flight of five different wines & a container of five different cheeses to pair with each one. The cheese came from the store attached to the winery, Cailloux Cheese Shop, a family-run, European-style shop that sells artisanal cheeses, charcuterie, bread, & accoutrements. The shop is named after the owner’s dog, Cailloux (pebble in French), whose ambitious attitude inspired Janelle, who has a graduate degree in geology, to pursue her passion & open up her own store.

Flight of wine from Crawford Family Wines

I have never enjoyed drinking wine more. All of the wines we tried were smooth, & even the dry reds had bold, fruity flavors. All of the cheeses were so different, from a creamy, soft goat cheese to a hard, smelly yellow cow‘s milk cheese with herbs. Every pairing of cheese & wine was the perfect complement, & after every tasting, we were left speechless & unsure how we would ever choose our favorite.

We finally settled on a 2014 Pinot Noir from Radian Vineyard. It had a brighter & fruitier flavor than any Pinot Noir I had ever had, & the finish was soft & lingered delicately on the tongue. We bought a bottle for later in our trip & then continued our stroll down the lane.

Before we left, I wanted to try authentic Danish food, so we went to Good Seed Coffee Boutique (because dessert with coffee is always better), & then went to Mortensen’s Danish Bakery for dessert. The pastries were huge! The majority of them stretched longer than my face. I wanted something small, so I chose a lemon petit four, & Joseph ordered a chocolate coffee cookie. I know, it’s they aren’t really danishes, but they came from a danish bakery & I have always wanted to try a petit four, so I let it slide.

I was glad I made the choice I did because the petit four was delicious. The soft, biscuit like cookie was smeared with a lemon jam & then topped with mousse-like lemon cream. Then the whole dessert was covered in a thin layer of buttercream with a delicate icing flower piped on top. It was dainty & delicious, the perfect sweet bite.

We left Solvang later than expected, so our next unexpected conundrum was what we should change in our itinerary. Our initial plan was to drive the scenic route to Bixby Bridge, then go to Carmel-by-the-Sea for dinner, & then drive the 17-mile-drive to our Airbnb. However, by now, it would be far too dark to see any of the views on our final drive. So, since we were still full from eating our way through Solvang, we decided to do both scenic drives first & then have a late dinner.

The route was breathtakingly gorgeous. All along our drive we looked over rocky cliffs to the restless sea below. The drive took longer than expected, & we arrived at Bixby Bridge just as the sun was setting. The light was perfect to snap a few photos & capture the scenic moment, & then to just stand together & soak in the view. Green mountains behind us, a rocky valley to our left, & a steep drop to the golden beach below with waves crashing to the shore in the dim light – despite the cold from elevation & ocean wind, we simply could not tear our eyes away. It was only when the sun was completely hidden by clouds that we finally returned to our truck.

Now, it was time for another itinerary change. Luckily, tomorrow was the only day we had planned to sleep in, which meant we technically had time to get up early & still drive to see the views on the 17-mile-drive in the early morning light. We decided to sacrifice rest for the experience tomorrow morning, & for the moment, the most important thing was to get some food in our stomachs.

We drove to Carmel-by-the-Sea, a bustling town despite the late hour & the chill in the air. The weather was reminiscent of fall. We both changed out of our summer clothes & put on sweaters & pants instead, & then headed into the romantic streets lit by street lamps & globe lights.

We decided to go to the TreeHouse Cafe for dinner. The wait was long, but we requested to sit at the bar, which got us seated immediately. While talking to the server & bartender, we mentioned we were on our honeymoon, & the next thing I knew, they were offering us a table out on the rooftop, surrounded by twinkle lights that looked like stars.

Joseph & me at our table at TreeHouse Cafe

For a starter, we ordered Greek Dolmas, a vegetarian dish made of stuffed grape leaves & served with tangy & creamy tzatziki. And for dinner, we split the seafood paella, a warm, comforting rice dish full of shrimp, chicken, sausage, clams, mussels & roasted vegetables.

When we told the server we were ready for our check, he told us not to hurry away, & a moment later, the manager brought us a chocolate cheesecake with raspberry sauce & whipped cream. Stuffed from our dinner but much to enticed to refuse, we both nearly finished off the cake together. Layers of moist chocolate cake & creamy, fudge cheesecake, balanced by the sour raspberry flavor & the creamy & cool whipped cream was the perfect, sweet ending to a delicious meal.

By now, the shops were closed, so Joseph & I walked the main street, taking in the ambience & staying close to one another to keep warm. We arrived shortly at our truck & then, after a long day, finally began the drive to our Airbnb.

All throughout the day, things didn’t go as planned, but they turned out so much better than we expected. We missed out on the Channel Islands hike that promised amazing views, but instead, we got to gaze out on all of Santa Barbara from the top of a mountain & soak in hot springs! Our stop in Solvang was longer than expected, although definitely worth it. Because of our extended stay, we missed driving the 17-mile-drive, but being late meant we arrived at Bixby Bridge right at twilight & got probably the best view of the day, & we are looking forward to the views we will get on our drive tomorrow morning. The restaurant we chose was crowded, so we settled for sitting in the bar, & then a nonchalant conversation turned into us getting the best seats in the house & a delicious dessert.

Life is full of sweet surprises. We just have to remember that when life throws us an unexpected turn of events, it might be to turn us into an even better direction.

Travel

Honeymoon West Coast road trip: Los Angeles (Day 4)

September 4, 2021 No Comments

Me with Queen’s Hollywood Star on the Walk of Fame

You know it’s going to be a good day when you wake up before your alarm clock because you’re just that excited to get started.

Today was the first official day of Joseph’s & my road trip adventure. Up until this point, we had spent our honeymoon relaxing & exploring San Diego, but today, we went to Enterprise & rented a car for the first time in our relationship to begin the trek north to Seattle.

And we didn’t get just any car. I waited on the bench outside with our many bags while Joseph went inside to get our ride. Twenty minutes later, he rolled up in a white 2021 Ram 1500 Classic, blaring Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins. We loaded up our bags & hit the road, ready to officially begin our adventure.

Our first stop was Griffith Park to hike the Brush Canyon Trail. The weather was cool at the beginning, so I made the mistake of not putting on sunscreen, & very soon regretted it. The trail wound up the side of a mountain littered with cacti, which provided little shade from the hot sun that baked on our heads from above & reflected up on our faces from the orange dirt beneath our feet. Despite this, we still had a wonderful time taking in the views on our trek up. On the way, we passed by a sign written by pebbles that read “Have a Nice Day,” which made us smile & gave us a little lift to carry us up to the top.

The view from the top of the mount was scenic, yet somewhat disappointing. I was under the impression that we would be hiking to the Hollywood Sign, but somehow, we ended up on the mountain beside it. The trail offered excellent views of the iconic spot, & looking back, that was probably better for pictures than standing right next to the letters, but I still felt a little wave of disappointment, standing exhausted & sunburnt at the top of the wrong mountain.

Joseph & me hiking on the Brush Canyon Trail

On our way back down, we met up with a man named Larry who was creating another sign that said “Have a Nice Day” out of sticks on the side of the trail. After a short conversation, we learned that Larry created a number of these signs all along the trails in the park, & he comes back almost daily to repair them for the hikers that pass by them every day. Larry was inspired by a hike he was on years ago where someone had lined the entire trail with sticks – the ambience it created added to the hiking experience, & Larry wanted to do that for the trails at Griffith Park. He started by lining the portions of trails with large rocks & boulders, & then he started creating arches out of sticks. His latest project has been creating these signs, & he finds joy in the smiles it brings to travelers’ faces.

Larry took our photo & wished us a happy honeymoon, & then we were on our way, smiles once again on our faces, just as he had intended.

Joseph & me with one of Larry’s “Have a Nice Day” signs in Griffith Park

Our next stop was Hollywood Boulevard. We ate a quick lunch at the truck & then drove into the city of Los Angeles. We had a two-hour time limit on our parking, which I was worried wouldn’t be enough time, but as it turns out, Hollywood Boulevard is not as exciting as I thought it would be, & we returned with time to spare. As we approached the boulevard, we walked along dirty & graffitied streets that already gave me a nervous feeling.

“This isn’t quite what I expected,” I said to Joseph.

“Yeah, it’s just…a city,” Joseph said.

“I hope Hollywood Boulevard is better, but it’s not looking good.”

My hopeless prediction proved true when we arrived at the famous road. Lined with cheap tourist shops filled with plastic Oscars statues, crowded with people walking blindly past groups of homeless city residents sitting on the sidewalk, the stench of weed hanging in the air, & with bright, flashing globe lights on the fronts of theaters that, instead of adding an affluence to the walk, just seemed to add to the facade of the entire attraction. The only enjoyment we had was reading every name on the Hollywood stars beneath our feet, excitedly calling them out when we recognized one. We took the required touristy shots of us sitting & kneeling beside the stars we liked best, grabbed some delicious coffee at Tiago Coffee Bar & Kitchen, a brightly colored cafe committed to cultivating a welcoming community for artists & the LGBTQ+ community. We then walked back to the car & began our drive to Santa Barbara.

Joseph & me with Etta James’ Hollywood Star on the Walk of Fame. I walked down the aisle to the song At Last by Etta James.

On the way, we decided to detour from our route to drive along the coast of Malibu. The waves were even bigger than the ones in San Diego. They lazily approached the shore, growing as they rolled like ice cream being scooped out of the container, before finally crashing against the sand. We admired the scenery as we drove, growing hungrier by the second but never regretting the longer drive.

For our Airbnb, we reserved a private room in a small home in Santa Barbara. We stuffed ourselves with leftovers & finally showered after a long, hot day in the sun, & then we crashed on the comfy bed & armchair in our room, exhausted from our day.

Our first day back on the road was tiring but exhilarating. It feels so good to be traveling again. I feel a little out of practice from our year-long hiatus – the long hours spent in the car, challenging hikes, & restless sleep takes a toll, but I know my body will adjust quickly to the new demands as it did before. Being able to travel & see this beautiful world is a true gift & blessing, & I plan on soaking up every minute of it.

But I don’t just want that mentality while traveling. That is the souvenir most important to take home with me. Every day has new experiences to be enjoyed, inspiring people to meet, & hidden blessings around every corner. We just have to keep our eyes open & appreciate every moment. We have to remember to stay focused on the positives & to embrace every new opportunity. And when surprising detours & trials come our way, our challenge is to simply appreciate them as part of our unique journey.

I guess I’m trying to say, as our new friend Larry put it much more simply, today, & every day, I hope you have a nice day.

Health

5 positive affirmations for peace of mind this summer

June 2, 2021 No Comments

After a season of growth, summer is the perfect season to relax & find joy in the present moment.

Positive affirmations are a great way to reframe your perspective on life & keep your mind focused on what’s most important. Your mindset has the power to give you more confidence & positivity in your daily life, or to bring you down. By repeating affirmations in your mind, you can ease anxieties & help yourself to focus on what’s most important.

These five affirmations are geared towards summer fun & relaxation. Whether you are trying to clear your mind while lounging by the pool, or if you’re attempting to ease anxieties before a big trip, these affirmations will help you enjoy your summer to its fullest. Feel free to share on social media, or save these graphics to make them your new phone background! It’s an easy way to remind yourself to repeat these words when you need them most.

Lifestyle, My Life

15 songs I listened to on repeat this summer

August 31, 2020 2 Comments

The summer is almost over, which means it’s nearly time for cozy sweaters and pumpkin spice lattes. It also means that the music scene is about to change from carefree beats to more sentimental tunes.

However, there are a few more warm days left. So, until the leaves start to change, I am going to keep listening to my summer vibe playlist, and I thought I would share it with you to enjoy, too. I have to warn you now: not all the songs are upbeat, but they make up the soundtrack of my summer of 2020.

I hope you enjoy it! Please feel free to share your favorite summer vibe songs in the comment below – I would love to add them to my listening queue.

Summer Vibes Playlist

1. Here Comes the Sun by The Beatles

I can’t go more than a few days of summer without listening to this classic goodie. Yes, finally, the summer is here, and the sun is out. It’s time to slow down and just enjoy life a little more.

2. The 1 by Taylor Swift (E)

Aptly named as the first song in her surprise new album, The 1 by Taylor Swift is the perfect introduction to an album with a completely different vibe than the artist’s previous works. It’s a bittersweet, regretful, lost love song that I can’t stop listening to.

3. Sleep on the Floor by The Lumineers

Me and my team at the Fred and Pamela Buffet Cancer Center in Nebraska during 4K for Cancer 2019

Something that characterized this summer for me was travel and adventure. I have always wanted to travel, but have never had the means or the time. This summer, I finally had the chance to explore the world outside of my comfort zone, and it was even better than I had expected. This song by The Lumineers is my favorite song to listen to while traveling. It was introduced to me by one of my teammates on 4K for Cancer in summer of 2019, and I can’t help but have joyful tears come to my eyes when I listen to it and think back to that crazy adventure.

4. Be Kind by Halsey and Marshmello

Hals e y has been one of my favorite artists since she started creating music. Her lyrics are always pure poetry. This collaboration with Marshmello is an upbeat song with a deeper meaning that touches on how we tend to hurt the ones who love us best.

5. Don’t Stop Me Now by Queen

It doesn’t matter the time of year or what I have planned for the day – this is always my favorite song to start my day with. It’s the song that always pumps me up and helps me feel ready for my day.

6 Wishing Well by Juice WRLD (E)

Juice WRLD passed away in December of last year due to an accidental overdose. However, his music has still continued to be released since then, and some of the songs, like this one, reveal just how much the young rapper was struggling. It’s an eye-opening song about depression and addiction set to a deceptively cheery beat.

7. Thunder by Imagine Dragons

In addition to “Don’t Stop Me Now” by Queen, this is the other tune I always turn to for a little motivation. It featured frequently on my summer queue this year as I struggled with unemployment and began to explore my passions more.

8. It’s Hard to be Human by Kina Grannis

This truly was the vibe of 2020, wasn’t it? It’s hard to be human, but luckily, it’s an experience we all can understand and empathize with. We’re all in this together.

9. I’m Alive (Life Sounds Like) by Michael Franti and Spearhead

The proposal 7/14/20 – Photo by Jon Mauler

I got engaged this summer! I can’t say too much about this song – stay tuned to the blog for more sneak peaks and details about Joseph’s and my 2021 wedding. This is just a little taste.

10. Reckless Love/Even If by Mass Anthem

“Even If” by MercyMe will always be the Christian song that touches my heart most. It was the song that changed my life. “Reckless Love” by Cory Asbury was the song I sang throughout my college years with my friends when we worshipped at Campus Crusade for Christ (CRU) club meetings. The combination of the two creates a song that never fails to bring tears to my eyes. During the hard moments this summer, this was the song I listened to for solace and comfort.

11. Colorado by CHAPPY

The highlight of my summer (besides, of course, getting engaged) was the road trip to Colorado with my new fiancé. This song was the soundtrack of our trip.

12. Own Alone by Bahamas

This was a song Joseph introduced me to, and I just can’t help continuing to listen to it. It has such a unique sound and fun beat; it always makes me smile.

13. How Many Times by Marcus Foster

This song is a bit more chill than some of the others on this list. It’s the perfect summer vibe song for a lazy afternoon in the sun.

14. In the Colors by Ben Harper and the Innocent Criminals

Joseph and me on the top of Mount Royal in Frisco, Colorado

This was Joseph’s and my summer vibe song. We listened to it quite a few times while spending time together in all the colors of summer.

15. Yellow Lines by Brendan James

Here’s one more of my favorite travel songs because I really did spend much of this summer traveling, specifically road-tripping. Driving along those yellow lines, this was the song I listened to most. This summer, I embarked on many adventures, not just in the places that I went, but in the new, life-changing steps I took in my relationship and career. It was a summer filled with long roads that lead to endless possibilities.

Lifestyle, My Life

How to budget when you have an inconsistent income

August 15, 2020 No Comments

Since the novel coronavirus hit in march, unemployment rates have been on the rise and many people have been concerned about the state of their wages. For those who are working, some people have had their salaries dropped, and I have many friends and family members who are worried that, if a second wave of the virus happens, they will lose their jobs, too.

I have never had a consistent income. Before and during college, I worked part-time jobs to make ends meet, and after school, I worked mostly freelance jobs, which meant there was never a consistent amount of money coming in. This never bothered me – I learned how to manage my money in a way that worked for me. So, when the virus hit, and my freelance jobs began to disappear, the way I budgeted my money actually stayed the same.

Many people take specific amounts out of their paychecks each week or month for savings or to give to charity. Because I have never had a consistent amount of money coming in, instead of taking out specific amounts of money, I split up my paycheck by percentages. This way, no matter how much I am earning, I always know how much money I have available for spending, how much should go into savings, the minimum amount I want to give to charity, etc.

This is not the ideal way for everyone to split up their incoming funds, but it works for me. And during such uncertain times, when paychecks seem to be less consistent for many people, I thought I would share how I split up my money as a possible option for others. You can use the percentages listed below, or just use my formula as a starting point to create a budget that works best for you!

My budget

Spend account – 60 percent (40 percent for essentials and 20 percent for recreational spendin)

The biggest chunk of my money goes into my spend account. The key here is that, hopefully, I won’t actually spend all of this money. This account also functions as a short-term savings account for bigger, unexpected expenditures. This is always the account I dip into first for any purchases, big or small, expected or unexpected.

Charitable giving – 10 percent

Ten percent of everything I earn is donated to charitable organizations of my choice. The organizations I donate to most frequently include Compassion International (I sponsor a child living in Ecuador), the Ulman Foundation, and United Church. I love also letting this account build up sometimes, so when I am asked for more sizable donations, I have the means to give. To be honest, though, I have a hard time saying “no” to people when they ask for support, so this account normally drops into a deficit, meaning I take some funds out of my spend account to donate, too.

Savings – 10 percent

Ten percent of everything I earn also immediately goes into savings. These are my long-term savings that I don’t touch unless it is an absolute emergency, or for very large purchases that I can’t cover from my spend account alone. As suggested by Dave Ramsay, I always try to have a minimum of $1,000 in this account in case of an emergency.

Adventure Fund – 10 percent

I am a saver, not a spender. I learned a long time ago that this meant I rarely spent on myself, which meant I ended up never doing anything that I really wanted to do with my life. So, I wrote myself a bucket list, and anytime I take a step towards achieving one of those goals, I take the money from my adventure fund. It’s a savings account for all of the life experiences I want to have. These include fun trips, like my road trip to Colorado, but also more practical purchases that are important to me, such as going to college and buying a home in the future.

Loan payments – 10 percent

Another 10 percent of my paycheck is designated to pay off debts, such as college loans. If there isn’t enough in this account to pay for loans, I take money out of my spend account, adventure fund, and savings (I also often take money from these accounts anyway to put extra money on my loan payments – the faster they are paid off, the better).

For me, having a budget has not been restrictive, but freeing! Knowing what I have to spend and feeling reassured that I have money set aside for paying off debts and saving for the future makes me feel more comfortable spending money on things that I want and need.

Comment below if you have tips to share on how you best budget your money, or if you have any questions about my budget formula!

Travel

How to travel during COVID-19

August 13, 2020 1 Comment

Joseph and me during our road trip to Colorado

Note: This post contains affiliate links. If you purchase a product after clicking the associated link, I will earn a small commission off of that purchase.

It seems like the novel coronavirus is not going anywhere soon, so we have all been tasked with finding ways to navigate this “new normal.” For travel enthusiasts, like me, that can be a difficult task considering the amount of risk and restriction associated with travel. Airports are practically a breeding ground for the virus, and every country and state has different mandates about how and when people are allowed to visit.

It is recommended to stay at home as much as possible unless travel is essential, but sometimes, we all need to step outside of our homes for our own mental health. If that’s you, consider using these tips to keep your travels as safe as possible.

1. Do your research

Research your own state’s laws and the laws of the state or country you are planning to travel to. Know what the restrictions are and what is required of you, such as having an extended quarantine when you arrive at your destination or after you return home. If you can limit your travel to within your own state, that’s even safer, and it can be more realistic if you can’t take the time off to quarantine from your job.

2. Wear a mask

Joseph and me on a main street in Leesburg, Virginia, where we were visiting Joseph’s sister, Jo, and her husband, Dan

Whether your state or the place you are visiting requires it, wear a mask. The most recent research shows that this protects not only the people around you, but yourself as well. Make sure the mask you are wearing is approved by the CDC, and please wear it over your mouth and nose. Both your mouth and nose lead to your respiratory system, so there is absolutely no point in leaving your nose exposed.

3. Go somewhere within driving distance

Joseph and me at Rocky Gap State Park during our road trip through Western Maryland

If you can, avoid international travel or travel to faraway states that requires a plane ride. Airports pose a much larger risk of contracting and spreading the virus than your own vehicle. If you can stay within your own state, even better. But if you want to travel out-of-state, consider the idea of road tripping there. The great part of this is driving to your destination enables you to see more of the scenery and to stop at other places along the way that seem fun or interesting. Make a road trip playlist (or use mine below) to listen to some entertaining tunes along the way.

4. Keep your hands as clean as possible

Wash your hands frequently, and keep a bottle of hand sanitizer in your car for times when you can’t. Keeping your hands clean dramatically reduces your chance to contracting and spreading the virus. And remember, even when you think your hands are clean, do NOT touch your face!

5. Stay away from other people as much as possible

Me hiking in Aspen, Colorado during Joseph’s and my road trip to Colorado

If you are traveling simply to get out of the house, consider alternatives to hotel stays and popular tourist attractions. Hiking, fishing, and other outdoor activities are great alternatives to walking busy streets. Consider packing your own food or getting takeout rather than dining at a restaurant. And while the weather is still warm, camping can be a more affordable and safer alternative to hotel stays.

6. Make it worth the trip

Joseph at Dan’s Rock Scenic Overlook during our Western Maryland road trip

Traveling to other places is fun, but it only seems worth it when you really get to experience those places. The good news is that the tourist attractions are often not the best way to achieve this – the best way to experience a place is to go where the locals go. So, again, do your research. Make a list of the places you want to visit and things you want to do that are low-risk, such as visiting national parks, scenic points, local eateries that are offering carry-out, and main streets in small towns.

7. Get tested for COVID-19 when you come home

Whether your state recommends it or not, a safe step you can take at the end of your trip is getting tested for COVID-19 as soon as you return and quarantining until you get the results. Waiting to interact with other people until you know you’re safe can help prevent the spreading of the virus to dozens of people. It’s always better to be safe than sorry, so if you are willing to take the risk of traveling, consider making sure that you are the only one who experiences any potential consequences of that choice.

Traveling can be a great way to take care of your mental health and get active in your daily life, but during times like this, it should always be done with caution and forethought. Don’t stop living life, but make sure when you do embark on any adventures, you are doing so safely for yourself and others.

Travel

Arizona vacation: Day 6

July 30, 2020 No Comments

After nearly a week spent in Arizona, the end of my vacation looming not far into the future, I finally had the chance to experience the state for the beautiful place it is.

Our destination today was Sedona. My dad and I got up early again to run before the heat of the day hit. After the workout, we enjoyed coffees and breakfast as a family, and then we headed out to embark upon our adventure.

Sedona is over two hours away from where Bev and Gus live, so the drive was a tad long and hot. Jake and I passed the time by playing a version of the alphabet game, which managed to entertain us for the majority of the ride.

“Don’t miss out on the scenery,” Bev called out jokingly. The barren red landscape changed minimally over the course of the trip.

However, as we got closer to Sedona, our surroundings did become more appealing. Large rock formations grew from the ground and stretched up towards the sky. We gained over 4,000 feet in elevation during our drive.

The temperature in Sedona was 10 degrees cooler than it was in Sun City. When I first learned this, I thought it would provide a great relief after days 100-plus degree weather. However, upon arrival, I realized that 10 degrees does not feel all that different when the temperature is still over 90 degrees.

All of us in Coyote Canyon – from left to right: Dad, Jake, me, Bev, Gus, and Mom

We ate a quick lunch and then walked to Pink Adventure Tours. Bev had signed us up for a Coyote Canyons Pink Jeep Tour, one of the moderate (which means not too bumpy) canyon drives. After receiving our bubblegum pink wristbands, we walked to the parking lot where there were multiple bright pink jeeps lined up beside one another. Our tour guide, Ryan, has been working for Pink Jeep Tours for 12 years, since the economic crash in 2008. He grew up in California, where he had worked in carpentry. When he lost his job, his parents suggested he turn his hobbies of Jeep driving and dirt bike-riding into a career, so he moved to Arizona and got the job he has now. The unfortunate thing, he said, was that, after spending so many of his days driving through the canyons, his hobbies no longer felt like fun past times. He just sold his last dirt bike a few weeks ago.

Ryan was a fantastic tour guide. He gave us the perfect blend of information and humor to make the tour fun and educational. It was a bumpy ride – the jeep tires, which were over half my height, climbed over boulders and down treacherous rocky trails, throwing us against our tightened seat belts. There were quite a few times that I held my breath, expecting the vehicle to tip, but Ryan was an expert driver who kept us safe.

As we rode, we admired the layers of red, white and brown on the canyon walls, formed over hundreds of years of different environments. Ryan stopped the jeep near an old, log cabin built by Earl Van Deren for him and his new bride in the 1890s. Walking up to that house, sweat pouring down my face, I could not imagine how anyone survived that long ago without air conditioning.

The jeep tour lasted two hours, but it felt much shorter. The good news is that, while it was fascinating and the views were beautiful, I don’t think any of us wanted the tour to last much longer. By the end, our pants were soaked with sweat as if we had been swimming, and we were all tired and thirsty from the heat.

We stopped at the gift shop for some souvenirs and then headed to Old Town Cottonwood, a small town not far from Sedona. The main street was quaint and alluring, but most of the shops were closed due to the novel coronavirus. Instead of walking the street, we went to Colt Grill, where we bought drinks to cool off. Bev and I each ordered a glass of wine, Gus and Dad ordered local beers, and Mom ordered a prickly pear margarita, one of the house specials.

Just before purchasing, a kind man seated at the bar announced that he would pay for our drinks. This was exceedingly generous considering how many of us there were. We thanked him profusely, but he shrugged us off. He told us he hated the racial tensions happening in the country right now, and he wanted to show us that there were no ill feelings between any of us.

Now, with our heads light on our shoulders from such a pleasant interaction (and the alcohol in our systems), we headed to where we wanted to eat. Rock Springs Cafe, which happens to be the oldest, independently owned restaurant still serving customers in Arizona, was one of very few buildings situated on a small exit off the highway. It consisted of a Mom and Pop-style store, a saloon, and the cafe, which was where the restaurant dining was located. The cuisine was homestyle comfort food, which, of course, wasn’t fancy, but it was delicious and filling after a long day. Our waitress was as sweet as the pies she served us. We ordered a rhubarb strawberry pie and a Jack Daniels pecan pie to bring home and enjoy with ice cream.

When we finally did arrive back at the house, Gus pointed out that we had been on our adventure for 11 hours, which explained the drawn looks on our reddened faces. The pie, however, brightened our spirits immediately. We sat at the table, laughing, talking and, once again, savoring the beauty of finally being able to spend time with one another.

Drinking at Colt Grill – from left to right: Bev, Gus, Mom, me, Jake, and Dad

This trip has been almost entirely about visiting family, which I could not be happier about. After about a decade since I have seen my relatives, it has been a true blessing to be reunited with them once again. Today, however, it was fun to experience Arizona for the amazing place that it is, to eat at a restaurant that only the locals know, and to travel a little out of our comfort zones to have a new experience we will never forget.

Even on relaxing vacations, it can’t hurt to have just a little taste of adventure sprinkled in.

Travel

Arizona vacation: Day 3

July 25, 2020 2 Comments

What do you do when someone you love is hurt?

The majority of our day in Arizona was uneventful. Everyone in the house seemed to be tired after the late night we had yesterday, so we decided to have a lazy day. We watched Hamilton and played games, and a couple of us even decided to enjoy an afternoon nap.

In the evening, Steve, Isabella, Kathleen, my mom, and I sat around the table to play cards. Dad retired to bed early, and Jake headed upstairs with Samuel and Thomas to play Mario Kart. Hours passed as we laughed and drank, determined to make the most of our last evening together in Tucson.

Near the end of the game, Thomas and Samuel came bounding down the stairs, followed by Jake, who was holding his right leg awkwardly in front of him as he hopped on his left foot.

“I was bitten by a scorpion,” he announced. A beat of silence followed this statement before all of us at the table stood.

“You were what,” Mom demanded.

“Bitten by a scorpion,” Jake repeated. He, ironically, seemed to be the calmest person in the room.

“Where?” Steve asked.

“In one of the bedrooms,” Jake said. “We were playing hide-and-seek.”

“He’s probably gone by now,” Steve said. Despite this, he still followed Jake back upstairs to the bedroom. A moment later we could hear the stomping of a heavy shoe, the sound that told us the scorpion had been both found and killed.

Mom ran out of the room to wake Dad, while I turned to the two girls.

“Get me some gauze and something sturdy to make a tourniquet,” I said. They both ran out of the room as I grabbed my phone to call 911. This, however, went out of my head as soon as Jake came back into the room. He rushed to his backpack, tore it open, and pulled out a military style belt, which he wrapped tightly around his upper leg.

“It says to do a cold compress and to keep the area elevated,” Kathleen said as she returned, reading off her phone. Isabella followed her and set the gauze I had asked for on the table.

“Tyler,” my mom called as she ran back into the room. “You’re driving.”

“I can’t drive,” I exclaimed.

“You need to,” she said. This, I realized a moment later, was true. Of all the adults present, I was the most sober.

Steve thankfully remembered to call 911 as I left the room to grab the car keys. I went to start the car, but after waiting for a few moments, I realized my family was not following. I ran back inside.

“Jake, you are going to cut off circulation to your leg,” I heard my mom say. “Loosen it up a bit.”

“No,” I exclaimed, rushing into the room. “That’s what a tourniquet is supposed to do.” Jake was lying on the couch, his foot elevated on my dad’s shoulder.

“How do you feel,” I asked him.

“It hurts,” he said to me with a smile. His jovial attitude reassured me. Steve walked into the room saying it was recommended we take Jake to the hospital. We helped Jake hop to the car, where I returned to my spot in the driver’s seat.

Luckily, I had drank very little, and we arrived at the hospital 20 minutes later. I dropped Jake off at the Emergency Room with our parents and then parked the car. Jake’s last request to me as he hobbled out was to keep his girlfriend, Jess, updated. I reassured him that I would, so the first thing I did in that hospital waiting room was send her a text of what I knew.

My parents and I waited in silence. A few minutes ticked by before the doctor emerged.

“He is going to be fine,” she said. “I gave him an ice pack, and we are going to monitor him to make sure he doesn’t have a reaction.”

“How long will that take,” my mom asked.

“At least an hour,” she said. “Also, unfortunately, because of COVID, you all can’t wait here. You can wait in your car, or you can go home, and he can call you when he is ready.”

We walked out of the hospital, each a little torn on what to do. When we got back in the car, my dad asked my mom if she wanted to stay or go.

“I guess we can go back to the house,” she said. I, personally, wanted to stay in the parking lot. I knew if it had been me in that room, it would be reassuring to know that my family members were so close by. But I reversed the car and drove out of the parking lot.

As we were driving back, Mom received a call from Steve. She relayed to him what the doctor had told us, and then she said that she was going to drop off me and Dad at the house and then return to the hospital. When she got off of the phone, there was a short pause before I spoke.

“I didn’t know you were planning on dropping us off at the house,” I said.

“Neither did I,” Dad said.

“If I had known, I would have just stayed at the hospital,” I said. “I don’t want to just wait at home.”

“Yeah, you’re not going back to the hospital alone,” Dad said. The bit of composure Mom had held onto until this point finally left her, and she broke down in tears.

“Then you make the decision, David,” she said. “I don’t want to make it.”

“Okay, let’s go back to the house,” Dad said, thinking practically. “It’s only 20 minutes away and we are already almost there. And when Jake calls, we will go straight back.” Mom agreed, but her tears only intensified. I checked the GPS and saw we were halfway between the house and hospital. With a deep breath, I pulled over the car onto a side road.

“This isn’t your turn,” Mom said.

“I know,” I replied. I parked the car and then turned to her.

“What do you want to do?” I asked. Mom didn’t answer me. “I think we should go back,” I said.

“You should ask your dad,” Mom said.

“It’s not about what I want,” Dad said. “It’s about what you want. What do you want to do?” Mom didn’t answer.

“Okay,” I said, putting the car back into drive. “We’re going back to the hospital. That’s clearly what you want to do. It’s what we all want to do.” I turned the car around and headed back down the highway. A few moments of silence passed before Mom spoke.

“Thank you,” she said quietly. At this moment, Dad’s phone began to ring. It was good that we turned around when we did because it was Jake calling – the hospital needed insurance information.

I drove back to the emergency room entrance, and Dad left the car. Through the windows, I could see Jake standing with a nurse in the waiting room.

“That’s Jake,” Mom exclaimed tearfully. “He’s standing up! That must mean he’s okay and he’s ready to come home, right?” She turned to me, her eyes hopeful and desperate, as if confirmation of this question was the lifeline she needed.

“I don’t know,” I told her. Mom bit her lip and looked back out the windshield, and then she rushed out of the car to greet her son, who was exiting the hospital. The two of them returned with Dad to the car.

My family. From left to right, Jake, Jess, Dad, me, and Mom

Jake was still in high spirits. On the ride home, he finally told us the full story: He had run into Steve’s bedroom during a game of hide-and-seek. The scorpion had been hiding right in the shadows behind the doorway. Jake said the sting had not hurt as bad as he would have thought. At first, he thought maybe it was a splinter. Then, after looking at it, he saw the area was red and swollen, so he thought maybe he had stepped on a bee. He used his phone flashlight to see what he had stepped on, and that’s when he saw the small, spider-like creature.

He did tell us it is actually not a good idea to use a tourniquet when stung or bit by a venomous animal.

“I knew it,” Mom exclaimed. The doctors had told Jake that using a tourniquet restricts all the venom in a high consistency to one area, so when the tourniquet is taken off, they have no way of controlling the venom spread into the rest of the body. It is better to elevate the bitten or stung area and let the venom seep slowly, in a more controlled state, through the bloodstream.

We returned to the house, where Jake’s main concern was where the scorpion was now. To his immense disappointment, Steve told him it had been flushed down the toilet. He had wanted to keep it, or at least get a picture, as a souvenir of his experience.

What do you do when someone you love is hurt? It’s difficult to know what to do, and everyone reacts differently. Some of us are overwhelmed by our own empathy and emotions; no one likes seeing someone they love in pain. Others become cool headed and practical, thinking only of the logical next step. Some become rooted to the spot, paralyzed with fear, while others snap into action as if they have been training for this for years. The interesting thing is there is no way to predict how you will react until you are in the situation; there is no way to prepare for the swarm of nauseating emotions or rush of adrenaline that will hit you. And the unfortunate thing is that you are most likely to make mistakes or do something unhelpful, such as recommending a tourniquet for a wound that shouldn’t have it, or being so overwhelmed by choices to make that you become too petrified to make any decision for fear it will be wrong.

What we can’t do is let these mistakes and shortcomings dismay us. After all, having made these errors means we did do the most important thing anyone can for someone in pain: We were there. We were present with the person who was hurting, and we did what we could and what we knew how to do. I am so grateful for each of my family members and the different skills they brought to the table, and I am especially appreciative for the doctors who knew what Jake actually needed.

And now that I am out of the situation and can finally think about how I feel, I am so very grateful that my brother is safe and healthy. His good sense of humor, kind disposition, and relaxed approach to life are always things I have admired and loved, and I could not imagine my life without my younger brother.

What do you do when someone you love is hurt? Hopefully, you just get the chance to be there with them.

Travel

Virginia overnight trip

July 18, 2020 1 Comment

The phone call came late on Tuesday afternoon.

While we were making dinner, Joseph’s sister, Joanna, called to ask if we wanted to visit her and her husband, Dan, in Virginia. They moved to Leesburg nearly six months ago, and although they live only an hour and a half away, we had not yet had the chance to visit. Joseph is about to start graduate school, and I am about to leave for a trip, so we did not have much availability in our schedules. When Joseph told Joanna this, she proposed we visit the next day.

We agreed. After Joseph got off of the phone, I proposed that we turn this visit into a longer stay. We have made it our quest to visit all 50 states plus Washington, D.C., and this was an opportunity to cross Virginia off of our list.

It may sound spur of the moment, but after planning for a two-and-a-half week Colorado road trip in only a few days, this seemed almost simple.

So, we packed snacks we had left over from our last trip, stuffed our clothes into overnight bags, and planned for where we wanted to visit during our trip.

To officially say that we visited a state, there are a couple of things we have agreed we need to do. We want to walk a main street, eat (or drink) at a local restaurant, hike at a national park, and visit a tourist or scenic spot. Only after completing all of these tasks can we visit a Starbucks and purchase our souvenir: A mug from the “Been There” series.

For this trip, we knew we would cross off the main street and local eatery with Joanna and Dan. After some research, we decided to hike at Shenandoah National Park and then visit Luray Caverns. It was an extra two hours of driving away from home, but we knew it would be worth it.

On Wednesday, we arrived in Virginia during the hottest part of the afternoon. As soon as we stepped out of the car, I was reminded that the hot and muggy weather in Maryland does not even compare to the moist heat in Virginia.

Joanna and Dan were both still at work when we arrived. Luckily, Joanna had sent us some ideas of things to do. We went to Ball’s Bluff Battlefield Regional Park, one of her favorite hiking spots. The park is the site where the Battle of Balls Bluff during the Civil War took place. It was interesting walking around the silent, serene trails, knowing it was a spot drenched in bloody history. This was a spot where the Confederate Army had won the fight. According to the American Battlefield Trust, the Union had 1,002 casualties that day.

After hiking, we went to visit Joanna and Dan at their apartment. It was an exciting reunion. We have not seen either of them in months, and the four of us have not spent time alone together in almost a year.

Joanna and Dan treated us to SideBar, a restaurant in downtown Leesburg. Like many of the businesses on the street, the restaurant was situated in renovated homes built in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries. The food was delicious. Our favorite dish was the sweet potato fries, which were topped with candied bacon and brie, and served with a maple sriracha sauce.

During dinner, the four of us got to talking about the Black Lives Matter movement and how it has affected the lives of those closest to us. It seems like so many people have different opinions on this movement. The four of us all fully support the peaceful protests, though we know that if we really want to see change happen, it starts with us in our personal lives. Joanna and Dan had a number of recommended podcasts for us to listen to, including 1619, an audio series created by the New York Times to enlighten listeners about the history of slavery in America and how it has impacted our country today. 1619 was the year the first enslaved Africans were brought to this country. What the four of us agreed on most is that, through all of this, the best way we can help is to educate ourselves on what has happened and what is happening in America, and then we can know better what we can do to help.

“We’ve learned that we have to speak up,” Joanna told us. “It’s not enough to just not say or do racist things. We have to call others out when they are doing something racist. And we have to be comfortable looking at ourselves and discovering where we may have biases, too.”

After dinner, we walked along the main street, taking in the sights and soaking in the historical significance of the place. We passed by homes that had been built centuries ago and signs commemorating the significant moments that had taken place there. The most notable things were the Civil War artifacts and commemorative items. According to the Thomas Balch Library website, Leesburg (originally called George Town) was built in 1740; it was named after the Lee family in 1758. We stopped at a sign in front of an old house on the street, where Robert E. Lee was treated for battle wounds he incurred during the Second Battle of Manassas (this battle occurred a little less than a year after the Battle of Balls Bluff – it was also a Confederate victory). As we walked, we passed by more historical markers, including Confederate statutes that, according to Joanna and Dan, the local government is debating removing.

On our way back to our car, we passed by a house on the market that the real estate agent, who was sitting on the front porch, claimed to be haunted. I grudgingly agreed to look around the house with my enthusiastic companions. We did not personally witness any paranormal activity, but the vibes in the home were disturbing to say the least, and I was grateful when we decided to leave.

We returned to the apartment, where we relaxed and spent more time with Joseph’s family, my soon-to-be relatives. I am so very grateful for their hospitality. It felt good to finally have the chance to catch up with them and what has been happening in their lives. Besides the fact that Joseph is more than the man I ever dreamed of marrying, I cannot believe I am so lucky that his family members are some of the kindest, most generous people I have ever met. I am very excited to be a part of this family.

When we awoke the following morning, Joanna and Dan had already left for work. Joseph and I ate a quick breakfast, and then we packed our belongings and headed out for another day of adventure.

The drive to Shenandoah was almost like déjà vu. The mountains in the distance were reminiscent of the Colorado landscape we had been traveling through not long ago. Despite these mountains being smaller than their western counterparts, they were still magnificent. They stretched so high into the sky that their tips were hidden away by the white clouds.

We drove up to Stony Man Mountain, a decent hike with breathtaking views of the world below. Little Stony Man had the greatest view; from there we could see Skyline Drive winding through the trees far below. We continued hiking to the top of the summit where we were greeted with, not a view of the world below, but that of the one above. Instead of looking out at mountains and trees, we walked straight into a cloud. A white haze engulfed us while a cool mist ran across our hot, sweaty skin, shielding us from the oppressive Virginia heat. It was not the finale we were expecting to our hike, but it was one of the neatest experiences I have had at the top of a mountain.

Our next stop was Luray Caverns. I had visited the attraction when I was a young child, and while I remembered very few specifics, I could recall how fantastic the views were. Joseph, who had never been, was more skeptical.

“Where are the caverns,” he asked as we drove into the parking lot. “Are they behind the buildings?”

“They’re beneath us,” I told him with a smile. I could tell that I had piqued his interested, but he still balked at the $30 entrance fee.

As soon as we stepped into the cavern, the air chilled around us as if we had been plunged into cold water. We traveled deeper into the darkness, gazing in wonder at the rocks growing up around us. The packet we had been given for our self-guided tour told us that the caverns have been growing, inch by inch, over hundreds of millions of years. At every turn, Joseph and I tapped on each other’s shoulders and pointed to different, incredible sights. We gazed together in wonder at Mirror Lake, the largest body of water in Luray Caverns. The water projects a perfect mirror image of the ceiling above, which gives it the illusion that it is several feet deep and filled with stalagmites (when, in actuality, it has only 20 inches of water at its deepest point). Thin rock formations hung from the ceiling like veils while deep hollows plunged into darkness beside us. In one room, we were greeted by ethereal music, played like a music box from an organ that uses the speleothems around it to produce the different notes.

“This was definitely worth $30,” Joseph told me, and I beamed.

On our way home, we visited Starbucks to buy lattes and our Virginia mug, the reward for our efforts. By the time we got home, we were tired and hungry, but the burgers in the fridge and pint of ice cream waiting in the freezer were a welcome change from the makeshift meals we had made during our road trip in Colorado. I had not expected to go traveling again so soon after our last trip, but this short little adventure had been more than worth it.

And just like always, I feel like our travels taught me something. Once again, I had to step out of my comfort zone to face and experience the world around me. There are quite a few alarming things happening in our country right now, one being the realization of the treatment of some of our fellow Americans. But as we discussed in our conversations with Joanna and Dan at dinner, one of the best things we can do is to educate ourselves on the topic, and then to not sit idly by when we see injustices take place. One of the best ways I have learned to do this is through my travels. This trip gave me the opportunity to have real conversations with people, and to take a step into history. It gave me a chance to catch just a glimpse of where all of this suffering, inequity and discrimination began. And now this blog and the life I have returned to are my opportunities to use that knowledge to do my part in creating change.

As Joseph said on the top of the Stony Man Mountain, “We are officially adventurers now.” Adventurers are people who seek new experiences, who step outside of their comfort zone in the pursuit of understanding what life truly is. Adventurers are those who take risks, even if it puts them in harm’s way, to create lives that are truly meaningful, for themselves and others. Adventurers seek to find beauty where others may miss it, and along the way, they attempt to connect with other people and build friendships in unlikely places.

We are adventurers, and this blog is just one small attempt to create a little space for beauty, connection and inspiration for this world around us.

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