It’s that time of year again. Early January is the time to set lofty goals we are often inspired to achieve for about a month & then forget about until another year has passed. The new year brings with it the desire to better ourselves, but how to achieve our goals can sometimes seem elusive.
While we have been taught how to set goals & told that we should set them every year, we often don’t know the necessary steps we need to take to achieve them. Achieving an attainable goal should only take a bit of your time each day, but it is something you have to dedicate yourself to daily to achieve it. The steps to achieve your goal should becoming a habit, not a chore.
Follow these four simple steps to make this the year you achieve your New Year’s resolutions & create lasting change in your life.
What is it you really want to achieve this year? What passion do you have that gets you really excited? Where do you see yourself being truly happy? Nothing is off limits. Nothing is unattainable. Sit down & brainstorm ideas. Think about where you like to be year from now, & then…
A goal in your head is erased as soon as a new thought enters. Write down your goal & put it in a place you will see it every day, such as your bathroom mirror. It should be something you see every morning so you remember to focus on it throughout your day. And every evening, you should see it so you can evaluate what you did that day to attain your goal & how much closer you are to achieving it.
When you write down your goal, make sure it is a SMART goal – Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant & Time-bound. Don’t be vague about what you want – put some thought into what it is & be specific in your wording. Make sure it is measurable so you can track your progress. You don’t just want to lose weight – you want to lose 50 pounds. Now, make sure it is attainable. Maybe 50 pounds seems a little too daunting, but 30 pounds? That is doable. Make sure you aren’t limiting yourself, but you don’t want to set a goal that you can’t achieve either. Next, make sure your goal is relevant. Do you need to lost 30 pounds? Do you even want to lose 30 pounds? Maybe there is another goal that would be better for you to focus on this year. And lastly, your goal should be time-based. For most New Year’s resolutions, this timeframe is one year.
A goal without a plan to attain it is as useful as a box of cake mix without any other ingredients. It has the potential to make a delicious cake, but without the eggs & oil, it’s just another box in your pantry.
Set a timeline for your goal, & then write out a list of smaller goals you have to achieve in order to make your big goal happen. Make sure the smaller goals are SMART goals as well.
For example, if you want to lose 50 pounds, just getting a gym membership & buying some celery is not going to make that happen. You need a plan & multiple steps to help you achieve that goal. Set aside time each day for a workout. Even better, mark the specific time on your calendar to make sure it happens. Look up healthy recipes & make a list of what you are going to eat each day. Keep a food journal. And then set timely goals for each month. By the end of month two, your goal should be about 10 pounds lost, which means each week you have to lose about one to two pounds. Focus on these smaller goals that will lead up to your bigger one, & by this time next year, you will be 50 pounds smaller.
This process applies to every goal you may set, not just losing weight. Set smaller goals along the way that will help you reach your big goal, & set aside time each day to achieve them. How much money do you have to save a month to save $1,000 by the end of the year? If you want to make this the year of trying new things, maybe make the third Saturday every month the day you try something new, like sky diving, so by the end of the year you have tried 12 new crazy things you never thought you would do. If you want to travel more, start planning your trip to Italy now, & each month set a goal you want to attain to make it closer to that trip: Save $1,000, get in touch with a travel agent, buy a fancy new dress you will only wear when you are finally being serenaded on a gondola. Whatever the goal is, set the steps you need to attain it, & then focus on those. They aren’t nearly as overwhelming, but if you follow the plan, the big goal will be achieved.
Do not wait until December to discover you have or have not attained your New Year’s resolution. Evaluate your progress as you go. Now that you have daily, weekly & monthly stepping stones put in place for the year, you are able to evaluate if you are on the right track to achieve your resolution, or if you need to set more attainable goals, work harder, or change another habit that’s getting in your way or limiting your progress. Whatever you do, do not get discouraged. If you have not made one stepping stone, you can still be successful. It is much easier to make small adjustments along the way than to make a big life change at the end of the year.
What are your New Year’s resolutions this year? Leave me a comment below & let’s support each other this year!
P.S. Newsletter subscribers this month receive a FREE set of planner sheets for their journal to help them keep their New Year’s Resolutions all year long. Receive this & more perks all year by signing up for the weekly newsletter here.
P. P. S. Evolve is offering a 30-Day New Year, New You program to help you achieve your health & wellness goals. You can learn more by emailing me with any questions at TylerVLayne@gmail.com
With the weather growing colder, the lack of sunlight, & much of the natural world around us lying dormant, it can be easy to feel the winter blues creeping in. We tend to spend more time indoors & be less active, which can be detrimental to our physical & mental wellbeing, & the stress of the holidays & pressure of the new year can make things even worse.
But winter, like all seasons, has its own unique joys to offer. I love to tailor my self-care practices & hobbies to the season I am in, & winter is the perfect season to reflect on your lifestyle & make some healthy changes.
As mentioned in previous blog posts, self-care is a very personal experience, & you should always make time to do things that bring you joy & comfort. But, there is nothing wrong with switching up your regular routine to reflect the unique joys & challenges that each season brings. Try a few activities, find what works best for you, & keep it in your back pocket for the next stressful day ahead.
One of the biggest challenges winter brings for our mental & physical health is the lack of sunshine. Even if you don’t suffer from seasonal affective disorder (SAD) (a type of depression caused by the lack of sunlight), the reduced levels of Vitamin D can still negatively impact your mental & physical wellbeing. And many of us are less active indoors, which means our bodies & minds only suffer more.
Make an effort this winter to get some sunshine. Even if it’s only for a few minutes a day, soaking in the sun’s rays can greatly improve your mental & physical health by regulating your melatonin levels, improving your sleep, reducing the effects of SAD, & strengthening your immune system. Take a walk, or just sit outside with a hot cup of tea or coffee & relax.
If you can’t get outdoors during the day, consider investing in a sun lamp. It’s not as good as the real thing, but spending 15 minutes basking in the glow of this fake sun can help improve your mental health.
Despite the lack of sunlight, our bodies are still losing water all the time, & it’s one of the most important elements we need to survive. When we don’t drink enough water, it negatively impacts our organ function, immune system, & energy.
Try to drink at least 64 ounces of water a day. If you are traveling, regularly exercising, struggling to get in enough sleep, or fighting off illness, consider also adding electrolytes to your drink. Nuun is a great choice – it has different options depending on your activity & personal needs. Nuun Vitamins, Nuun Immunity, & Nuun Rest can all be great options to drink daily.
Your skin also needs some extra hydrating love in the winter. Buy yourself a quality, unscented moisturizer to nourish your skin with daily.
3. Treat yourself
My delicious, healthy hot cocoa – get the recipe here
The holidays are full of yummy treats to indulge in, & once the holidays end & the winter blues often kick in, we can find ourselves craving those indulgent cookies & cakes again.
It’s important to treat our food as fuel. The goal at feeding times should always be to nourish ourselves. But when you are craving a special treat, there is nothing wrong with indulging yourself. In fact, studies show when you satisfy a craving with a small treat instead of restricting yourself, you are less likely to binge later, which means you will be more successful at achieving your health & wellness goals.
So, go ahead – have that cup of hot cocoa & a cookie, snuggle up in a warm blanket, & enjoy those chilly winter evenings.
The limited daylight means we are often less active in the winter. This can lead to weight gain, inflammation, & fatigue. Energize your body by moving it in loving ways. Go for a run or walk, lift weights, do yoga, or even join a fun class at your local gym! Just getting your body up & moving releases happy hormones like serotonin that will help you feel better throughout your day & give you the energy to tackle your goals.
The weather outside is frightful, but a hot, bubbly bath is so delightful.
Warm yourself up with a hot bubble bath on cold winter nights. You can even add some epsom salts to help detox your body of any toxins it may be holding & decrease unhealthy inflammation. You could also add some therapeutic-grade lavender essential oil to help calm your senses. Light some candles to add to the ambience & turn on some relaxing music or read a book to relax & decompress.
When we spend more time indoors, we tend to spend more time alone, which can lead to feeling isolated from the world. Make it a point to reach out to friends & family members, even after the holidays. Invite friends over for dinner, or even just make time for a weekly phone call with someone you love. It can help you to feel more connected to others, which is important for your mental health & wellbeing. Studies show that people who feel connected to others have lower levels of anxiety & depression, & they also tend to have higher levels of self-esteem & self-confidence.
With all this time cooped up indoors, winter is the perfect season to explore new hobbies & interests. Why don’t you read that book that’s been sitting on your shelf for months, or why don’t you finally start learning to paint? Try something creative, or sit down to research & learn about something new. You might find you discover a new passion you never knew you had.
Winter is the perfect time to set goals & resolutions for the year ahead. What have you been wanting to achieve in your life? What passions do you have? Set new goals for the year, & then make a point every week to do something to help you achieve them. If you want to lose weight, make it a goal every week to exercise & eat healthy. If you want to improve your financial literacy, make a weekly/monthly budget. If you want to read more, pick out a new book every month. Whatever your goal is, write out a list of smaller steps to help you achieve that lofty long-term resolution so it seems more manageable & achievable.
If you’re stuck inside looking out at the cold, you might as well make the best of it. Cozy up with a hot drink, a good book, & a warm blanket, or have a movie night with your family, huddled up in a blanket fort in your living room. You can have a pyjama day, or spend time practicing hygge in your space.
As stated above, the winter season is full of tasty treats that are meant to make us feel warm & cozy inside. It’s the perfect time to indulge & enjoy, but those winter treats can also add up, which means more inflammation, weight gain & bloating.
Focus on eating lots of protein & vegetables in your daily life. Decrease your consumption of processed foods, & instead, eat more foods that come from the earth. Your physical & mental wellbeing will improve, which means the next time you see a tasty treat, you can enjoy it without feeling regretful later.
What are your favorite winter self-care activities? Leave me a comment below!
The holidays are upon us, which means lots of time spent with loved ones, enjoying the warmth of the indoors, a lavish dessert table always just a few steps away.
The holiday season is a wonderful time of year that should be enjoyed & indulged. But with a different party at every turn, it can be easy for those holiday treats to add up.
In my holistic wellness business, I focus less on the number on the scale & more so on the numbers of health biomarkers. Put more simply, I focus on how my clients are feeling & how healthy they are. When people engage in healthy habits, they feel better, mentally & physically, & a healthy weight will come from those healthy habits in its own time.
This holiday season, it’s important that we focus less on our weight & more so on how we are feeling. Despite the fun festivities this time of year, there are many factors that impact our emotional & physical health in a negative way. The limited sunlight, busyness of the season, & tempting sugary treats can cause anyone’s health to decline. Given most of us would like to enjoy this special time of year, it’s important that we take care of ourselves, emotionally & physically.
If you are struggling to find ways to keep your health goals on track this season, read below for seven healthy habits that will help you take care of your body & mind. And like I said before, if you are worried about those holiday pounds, these habits will also keep your waistline in check, or possibly even shrink it a little.
1. Prioritize eating enough vegetables & protein at parties
There is no doubt that there will be plenty of carbohydrates & fats at every party. Dishes laden in butter always find themselves on the dinner table, along with rolls & potatoes, & the desserts are always full of delicious sugar. To keep your goals on track, instead of focusing on & limiting foods deemed “unhealthy,” intentionally nourish yourself with protein & vegetables.
Focusing on limiting our intake of certain foods can negatively impact our mental health. While portion control is always a good idea, completely restricting or starving ourselves of foods we love can make us feel unhappy, & it is correlated with unhealthy binges when we finally give in to our desires.
Instead of limiting or restricting, focus instead of what your body needs. There will be plenty of carbs & fats, so fill your plate first with protein & vegetables. Nourish your body. Then, if you are still hungry, enjoy some of your favorite fat- or carb-heavy dishes. By making your protein & veggie intake a priority, you are more likely to have a balanced plate, which means a well-nourished body. Remember, carbs & fats are an important party of our daily nutrition intake, too, so they do not need to be entirely avoided.
The easiest way to keep your metabolism running, gut moving steadily, & to get a lovely serotonin (or happy hormone) boost is to exercise. Keeping your body moving can also help you detox from anything you have eaten that your body doesn’t enjoy, & it will help you use up some of the extra energy (food) you have consumed.
Most importantly, exercise makes our bodies feel good. Eating more sugar can increase inflammation, eating more salt can increase water retention, & eating rich foods in general can cause bloating & discomfort. Exercise can help combat all of these symptoms, which will help us feel our best for our next celebration.
Exercise also impacts our mental health in a positive way. Despite the extra exertion of energy, exercise releases hormones in our body that make us feel happy & energized. This means more productive work days & more fun at parties. Engaging in regular exercise can also help us have more productive sleep, which brings us to our next topic.
Sleep is one of the most important things we can do for our health. It is essential for our bodies to rest in order to grow strong & healthy. Our muscles repair & grow from exercise when we sleep, & our minds are able to decompress during REM sleep from anything stressing us in our lives.
When we don’t get enough sleep, it impacts us both mentally & physically. Limited sleep actual causes a reversal in the hormones released in our bodies. Normally, sleep releases leptin, which makes us feel rested & satisfied. But when we don’t get enough sleep, cortisol & ghrelin are released instead. Ghrelin makes us feel hungrier & causes sugar cravings, which means the morning donut you might normally pass up for a healthier choice suddenly becomes a donut or two for breakfast. Cortisol causes stress & inflammation in the body, & it can also cause an unhealthy weight gain around your stomach & thighs. Limited sleep is directly related to a weakened immune system & higher risk for disease.
Cortisol negatively impacts our mental health as well. When we have higher levels of cortisol, even small stresses in our daily lives seem unmanageable. There is a mind-body connection, & when we don’t take care of & let our bodies rest, our minds feel it, too.
If you are feeling extra stressed in your life, think about whether or not you are getting enough sleep. The phrase “Have you tried turning it off & on again?” applies to humans, too. Aim to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep each night for the best results. This will also allow for an ample amount of REM sleep, which, as stated above, is our body’s way of handling daily stresses in our lives. If you have a big problem you can’t solve, you may want to sleep on it. You might find in the morning, your subconscious brain has created a solution for you.
We can’t always use sleep as our means for rest, especially in the middle of a work day. If you find yourself feeling stressed during your day, take a few minutes to practice mindfulness exercises.
Engaging in a regular mindfulness practice has numerous benefits. From lowering stress to decreased blood pressure, mindfulness exercises like meditation, mindful walking & yoga can help increase our quality of life. Even if you only have 30 seconds to spare, sit, focus on your breath, & be present. You will be amazed at how much this simple exercise can make you feel more at peace in your daily life.
Like stated above, completely restricting or starving yourself of your favorite foods can negatively impact your mental & physical health. We tend to feel discouraged & saddened when we completely restrict ourselves from the foods we love, & when we do give in to temptation, its all too common to go on an all-out binge & eat way more than we would have initially.
The holidays are a perfect time to enjoy special treats. When you go to a party, give yourself a chance to make a selection of one or two desserts instead of sampling every single one. Walk down the table once to take a look at the options, & then a second time to get a piece of the ones you want. This helps you to avoid the all-too-common mistake of grabbing the first dessert that looks good, & then realizing the one you really wanted was all the way at the end of the table. Eating only one or two desserts will also help keep those carbs & sugars in check, so you can enjoy the holidays while keeping the inflammation & weight gain to a minimum.
Intentional exercise is not the only time we should be moving our bodies. Many people engage in regular exercise, but then spend the rest of their days sedentary at their desks. This not only increases your chance for weight gain, but it can increase inflammation & muscle tightness, which can lead to more chronic illness.
If you find yourself sitting for most of your day, set a timer to get up & take a walk every once in a while. Even if it’s only for 15 minutes on your lunch break, or a quick 2-minute walk to the water cooler each hour, your body will reap the benefits, & it may help you feel better mentally, too! Working all day can be draining, but taking a quick break to move & breathe can help you to refocus & re-energize.
There are fewer hours of daylight in the winter, which means more time spent indoors. Often, this time spent inside is much less active than the time spent outside, which means people tend to get more sedentary. The extra energy we are getting from holiday foods is stored rather than burned, & our muscles get stiff from the lack of use. The limited sunlight can also cause a deficiency in Vitamin D, which can weaken your immune system.
The best remedy is to get outdoors. It may be cold, but even just spending15 minutes in sunlight daily can combat all of the regular effects of the winter darkness. Go for a walk, meditate, or just relax on your front porch drinking a hot cup of tea.
If you absolutely can’t get outdoors during the day, consider getting a sun lamp. It’s not as good as the real thing, but spending 15 minutes basking in the glow of this fake sun can help improve your mental health.
8. Eat mindfully
Harvest Bowl with Pumpkin Polenta – click here for the recipe
There is so much good food during the holidays that we often tend to stuff ourselves far beyond what our bodies need. Remember, food is fuel, & the goal at feeding times is to nourish ourselves.
When you arrive at a buffet-style party, use the same strategy as used for the dessert table. Walk down once to peruse what the options are, & then walk through a second time to fill your plate with what you want. Remember to make the majority of your plate proteins & vegetables, & then add smaller portions of the carbs & fats you want. Eat slowly, engage in conversation, & relax for at least 15 minutes after eating before getting up for seconds. You may find you are satisfied with the amount that you initially ate.
The holidays have a lot of fun foods that we don’t normally get, so to make sure you don’t feel like you are missing out with smaller portions, eat mindfully. Chew slowly & savor the flavor of what you eat. Pay attention to the smell, texture & taste, & feel how good it feels to put these warm, comforting foods in your stomach. The goal of eating mindfully is to feel satisfied, instead of restricted or stuffed, at the end of the meal.
One of the most important things you can do for your health is to hydrate your body. In the winter, your body will thank you for this in many ways.
Our bodies need water to operate. When we don’t drink enough water, it negatively impacts our organ function, immune system, & energy.
Try to drink at least 64 ounces of water a day. If you are traveling, regularly exercising, struggling to get in enough sleep, or fighting off illness, consider also adding electrolytes to your drink. Nuun is a great choice, with different options depending on your activity level & personal needs. Nuun Vitamins, Nuun Immunity, & Nuun Rest can all be great every day options to drink.
10. Check-in with yourself
Me meditating
The most important thing you can ever do for your health is to check in with yourself. We all have different needs, & you know your body best. What is your lifestyle lacking? What practices would add more quality to your life? If it’s more sleep, create a regular sleep schedule & set a timer to go to bed each night. If it’s drinking water, set a timer on your phone to remind you to drink, or get a fancy water bottle that helps you keep track of how much you have consumed throughout your day. If it’s making healthy food choices, bring the healthy food choice to a party so you know there is at least one dish there that you can enjoy & share with others. If it’s exercising, find a buddy to keep you accountable or a gym class that you enjoy. If you need more time for self-care, schedule it into your planner & be intentional about what you do during that time.
Whatever it is that your body or mind needs, have grace & love for yourself & take the time to engage in self-care. More than anything, this is what will help you live your healthiest lifestyle & feel your very best.
Arizona is known for its hot, desert climate; its red canyons; & its tall, saguaro cacti. When I think of Arizona, I think of old western movies – men in tall hats riding horseback through the desert. So, it was fitting that we ended our Arizona journey riding on the backs of horses ourselves, looking out at the sunset.
Most of our day was relaxed & lazy. We went to visit my great uncle & aunt, & we spent a few hours in their living room reminiscing about days long past. As the afternoon began to draw to a close, we drove to Estrella Mountain Regional Park, where Corral West Adventures was tucked away.
Corral West Adventures is a nonprofit organization that rescues horses. They offer horse rides through the Sonoran Desert, & we chose to do their famous sunset ride.
Our instructor was informative & friendly, & soon we were clip clopping over the rocks into the desert. It reminded me of those old western movies, where the cowboys ride off into the sunset. The setting sun bathed the desert in orange light. On every side, mountains grew up around us, & above our heads, the sky was painted in purple & pink stripes. From our slow, relaxed ride, we were able to observe sights of the desert we may have missed before: The saguaro filled with holes from owls who had made their homes inside, & a prickly tree whose leaves smelled like soap when you rubbed them between your fingers.
Joseph & me horseback riding in Estrella Mountain Regional Park with Corral West Adventures
As the light faded & we returned our horses to their home, we said a final goodbye to Arizona. We would not be leaving for a few more days, but this time would be dedicated entirely to family whom we so rarely get to see.
I took one last look at the desert landscape, & despite my love for forested mountains & cooler weather, I felt a small twinge of sadness to be leaving so soon. The desert has an unexpected beauty of its own. In this place that seems inhospitable to all, life somehow still flourishes. At first glance, the landscape is brown with just a little muddy orange & red to accent, but when you take a closer look, you see colors you never imagined – bright blues, greens, pinks and oranges paint the trees, flowers & desert fruits. There is such beauty & mystery to this place, & so much more to explore.
As the sun set, I bid the desert farewell, with a quiet promise that we would return again soon, hungry for more adventures.
In 2003, USA Today named Sedona “the most beautiful place on earth,” & after visiting, I have to say it is definitely one of the most striking landscapes I have ever seen. The color of the mint green & teal trees pop against the brick red & burnt orange rock Sedona is known for. Spiky agave plants in the color of cyan dot the landscape of loose, faded orange sand, & all around the town, the tall mountains that stretch up towards the sky have been painted red halfway up, as if God took a step back from his art project halfway through said, “It is finished.”
We left early for Sedona. The world was still dark as we drove through the desert landscape. We watched with tired eyes as the sun rose up behind the purple mountains into the pink & orange striped sky.
Our first stop in Sedona was the trailhead of Devil’s Bridge. I stand corrected about the weather in Arizona in December. It does, in fact, get cold. When we began our hike, the weather was in the 40s, & we were all a little chilly in our hiking clothes as we began the trek towards the bridge.
For over a mile, the hike was mostly flat in soft dirt. We chatted as we walked & admired the scenery – the red canyons & bright green & blue of the trees. I have never seen plants of such a beautiful color, & the red of the rock really made them stand out. When we got to the last half mile, the trail turned to stairs formed from the rock, & then just large rocks that we had to climb to the top.
Devil’s Bridge is a natural sandstone arch in the Coconino National Forest. It was formed from years of wind & weather erosion that only left the top of the structure. From the top, it’s a 54 foot drop, which, despite the bridge being five feet across, still feels daunting when you look over the side.
One by one, we stepped out onto the bridge to get our picture taken by those back on the trail. Standing on the bridge, looking over the desert, was both exhilarating & terrifying. The desert was strikingly beautiful – I could have stayed on that bridge gazing at it for hours. But only one person was allowed on the bridge at once & there was a line of people waiting to get their picture taken in the same iconic spot where the bridge thins ever so slightly & looks even more terrifying.
We headed back to the car to return to town, where we stopped at Berry Divine for a post-hike treat. Berry Divine serves delicious açai bowls topped with multiple combinations of fruit, granola, nuts, coconut oil, chocolate, & more! I have never had a smoothie bowl like it. The açai was the consistency of thick ice cream, & it was both tart & sweet, a delightful contrast on the tongue. I ordered the Red Rock Bowl, which was topped with tart raspberries, goji berry & raspberry puree balanced with sweet banana & crunchy granola. The result was satisfying & surprisingly filling.
At this point, our group split up. We dropped Jake & Jess off to go on a Pink Jeep tour in the desert, & then we picked up Starbucks & went to the trailhead once again, where Mom & Dad dropped us off & then went back to Sedona to walk the town. Coffee in hand, Joseph & I went back on the trails.
We took the Brins Mesa Loop which took us into the mountains & Coconino National Forest. I was stunned to see so much life growing in a desert! All around us, trees grew thick, at some points blocking the red rock from view. We traveled up, covering over 1,000 feet of elevation, all the while stopping to turn on the spot & gaze in wonder at our surroundings.
At the top of our hike, Joseph led us on an impromptu detour. We left the trail to climb up to the top of an outlook point. From our perch, we could see the buildings of Sedona against the backdrop of indigo mountains, the tops of which were hidden by thick, gray clouds. We sat for a moment, looking down over the valley below, before finally scrambling back down the rock face & continuing down the trail.
Climbing up to Soldier’s Pass was no easy feat. The elevation spiked quickly, & we were both out of breath as we climbed up to the cave. To enter, fallen rocks had formed a natural set of stairs. The cave itself was lit by multiple openings that gave gorgeous views of the mountains & trees. We sat in one of the holes to rest & take in the arresting view. Sedona truly is magnificent.
We were running late to meet up with our companions, so we ran the next half mile to the Seven Sacred Pools. Each pool almost perfectly circular, & they stepped down a slope, each holding still water that reflected the sky above. In the desert landscape, they, like the trees, looked out of place, & I was left wondering how such perfect little pools, all lined in a row, had been made in the rock.
We ran the last mile back to the car, & arrived at the trailhead just minutes after our family had arrived to pick us up. Once there, we all agreed to go to Old town Cottonwood for dinner. It’s a small town in the heart of wine country, filled with locally owned shops & charm.
We chose Colt 804 Grill for dinner, & we were not disappointed. The barbecued & smoked meat are cooked to succulent perfection, & each of the homemade sauces offered are unique & mouth-watering. I ordered a cobb salad with smoked bacon & beef brisket, & despite the enormous portion, it was so good I nearly finished the entire bowl.
It was getting dark & cold, but we decided to walk the streets for just a few minutes to take in the sights. Christmas lights lit our way down the busy, small town road. Most of the shops were closed, but we did dip into Verde Valley Olive Oil Traders, attracted less by the little bottles of oils & more by the friendly looking dog inside. After getting our fill of pets & cuddles, we did end up buying a delicious package of peppermint bark fudge for dessert.
The drive home was quiet. We were all tired from our long day. But it was a good tired – one I feel after many of my adventures with Joseph after our full days of hiking & traveling. It was so exciting to be able to experience that with my family as well, & I am looking forward to many more adventures with this awesome group of people. I loved that we started the day together, a few of us stepping a little out of our comfort zones for the hike but enjoying the time with one another. And then I even enjoyed splitting up for the afternoon, each doing the activities that we most love, & then we met up once again to enjoy a meal & share about our days. All during dinner, we were passing around phones, sharing photos as we described in rich detail all of the amazing things we had experienced.
Me at the impromptu outlook point Joseph took us to off the trail
If you have the chance to visit Sedona, I highly recommend it. There is definitely something for everyone there. Whether you want to go out on the trails, window shop in town, or on an adventure in a bubblegum pink jeep, everyone in your group is bound to have fun.
And just once, while you are there, take a step back & just soak in the view. Notice the vibrance of the colors, the sound of the wind in the leaves of trees in what should be a barren landscape, & the smell of sweet desert flowers & fruit. I would go so far to say that visiting Sedona is a spiritual experience. It’s a reminder of just how beautiful life is, & how even in the most challenging & dismaying circumstances, there is always a way to, not just survive, but to flourish & grow into something beautiful.
When you are traveling with a group, it is inevitable you will run into different opinions about what to do. And when you only have one vehicle, things can get even more complicated.
On the first morning with no plans for our trip, everyone had different ideas of what to do. My brother, Jake, & his fiancé, Jess, wanted to go horseback riding or rock climbing. Joseph & I wanted to go hiking. And my mother, the practical one, wanted to go grocery shopping.
Because my mother’s activity of choice was the most essential, she won the use of our sole vehicle. The rest of us waited at the Airbnb, talking about what to do next. We looked up horseback riding & decided a sunset ride a few days from then would be best, so that left a decision between hiking & rock climbing. Jake & Jess decided to drive with us to our hiking spot of choice, where there were plenty of small mountains to climb.
We left after 10am, far later than I had wanted. The sun was high in the sky by this point & beat down on our heads as we set off on the trail. Within minutes, I could feel my skin starting to burn & regretted not bringing sunscreen.
Joseph on the Verrado Petroglyphs trail
Despite the late hour, the trail was a lot of fun. My dad accompanied Joseph & I on our hike, & we passed the two hours chatting & pointing at sightings of wildlife as we trekked up the trail. We spotted a family of deer stepping lightly around the cacti that littered the ground, & my dad pointed to an empty spot of trail at one point that, a moment before, a road runner had scuttled across.
We climbed up a few rocks of our own to see the view, which, while brown & tawny, was spectacular. Now a few miles into our hike, we were completely surrounded by mountains & tall saguaros that showed us just how magnificent you can grow to be when you are willing to adapt to your environment.
We had chosen the Verrado Petroglyphs trail to see the ancient cave drawings carved into the rock. Unfortunately, all we caught was a small glimpse of this ancient art form. The one large boulder that contained the drawings had been blocked off with a chain link fence topped with barbed wire loop. We peered in to look at what appeared to be ancient stick figures & squiggles, & I was met with a moment of glee at thinking that people so many thousands of years ago drew pictures much like the ones we draw today.
Jake & Jess met up with us in the parking lot, & after getting coffee, we drove back to our Airbnb where Mom was waiting for us. We decided to spend the night in & got some snack food & drinks from the grocery store. Joseph turned on some music, & he, Jake, Jess, & Dad jumped into the pool while Mom & I sat out & just enjoyed the ambience.
When we grew hungry for dinner, we decided to continue our quest to find the best tacos in the area. Yesterday, we visited Baja Tacos for dinner, & the delicious food inspired us to try other local Mexican restaurants & decide which was the best. This time, we tried Oscar’s Taco Shop. The food was incredible, full of bold flavors that both contrasted & complimented one another. Salty cheese, creamy sour cream, earthy avocado, & spicy sauces made each dish a plate of perfection. I ordered the taco salad with shrimp in a fried tortilla bowl, which, while it was not quite the warm & comforting tacos I had tried the day before, it was still utterly satisfying. The tortilla was fried until crispy but it still tore softly & melted on the tongue, & the salad was fresh but still filling.
Compared to Baja Tacos, Oscar’s Taco Shop had more variety & included vegetables in their dishes, which is a huge win for me, but Baja Tacos’ homemade sauces & small business charm that could somehow be tasted in its food still made it a tough competitor. All in all, I think we will have to try another Mexican restaurant before we make our final pick.
We ended the evening resting our full tummies while playing a new card game, Uno Flip, which my mom had bought that day while running errands. Laughing around the table, I was struck by just how happy I was in how the day had turned out. We all have our different interests that pull us in differing directions, both in our daily lives & on vacation. But I love it when we all have the chance to come together & spend time with one another. There is nothing sweeter than that time spent around the table, laughing, talking & enjoying each other’s company.
When we return home, we will once again separate to our different lives, but I have hope that we will continue to seek special moments like these, where we can set any differences aside & enjoy the time spent with one another.
What do you pack for a trip to Arizona in December? According to the internet, everything. Tank tops & sweaters, bathing suits & gloves – bring a few suitcases & pack generously because you never know what to expect.
It was a late night before the plane trip. Because of a fun, Christmas event at work, I was up late packing. Before I knew it, 1am had arrived, & it was time for me to get ready.
We had a few small disputes among the family on what time to leave for the airport. To err on the side of caution & make sure no one felt anxious about missing the flight, we arrived at the airport an overly responsible two-and-a-half hours early.
We zoomed through baggage claim & security, & then used our extra time to enjoy a relaxed breakfast & coffee before our flight. The world was still dark when we ascended into the sky, perfect for an early morning nap.
We arrived into sunny Arizona by late morning. We were not allowed to check-in to our Airbnb until later in the day, so we went straight to visiting family instead. We met up with my uncle, his girlfriend, & three of his children in their hotel room, & then we all went to my great aunt & uncle’s home for dinner, where we met up with a couple of my mom’s cousins & family friends. We were all gathered together from all over the country for my great uncle’s 87th birthday.
It was fun to spend our first evening just relaxing with family. We spent the time enjoying drinks & good food, chatting & laughing. With thousands of miles dividing us, we hardly ever get to spend time or catch up with these family members, & it is always a joy to hear the stories from the past couple years & reminisce together.
The night grew late far faster than expected, & being awake for over 22 hours on three hours of sleep was taking its toll. We left, yawning & bleary-eyed, & drove through the streets lit bright with Christmas lights to our Airbnb. There is something quite interesting about hearing Christmas music & seeing Christmas decorations in such a hot, dry climate. Whoever said Arizona gets freezing cold in the early morning & late night must have been an Arizona native, because anyone who comes from a climate that actually grows reasonably cold would respectfully disagree. It gets chilly, but shorts & a hoodie still suffice. And to be dressed in summer clothes while experiencing the merriment of Christmas seems a little bizarre. I know many people go somewhere warm for the holidays, but I am a traditional Christmas movie girl & I want the snow, sweaters & pine trees, not sun tan lotion, bathing suits, & palm trees.
We slept in late the following morning to make up for the exhaustion the day previously. Joseph & I started the day with a run in our neighborhood, & then we met up with my uncle, his girlfriend, & our cousins for a trip to the Phoenix Zoo. We walked through the paved streets, peering in at the exhibits & chatting comfortably. The exhibits were nice & appeared comfortable for the animals, but the true attraction was spending time with family.
The sky was still light when the zoo closed, so we decided to go on a little adventure & go to the Hole in the Rock. It’s an easy hike – just over a quarter mile – that leads to a scenic point created by an unusually large hole in the tall rock.
I suppose it was a little too boring for those in our group with overly adventurous spirits. My dad, brother & Joseph decided to take the hike to the next level & climb up the front of the rock structure, which was no easy feat considering the grade of the ascent & my brother’s casual dress shoes. The rest of us walked around the rock structure & walked up the steps in the stone that lead to the wide hole. The setting sun reflected off of the red rock, creating a warm glow that emanated from the hole as we hiked up. Once inside the hole, the rock formed a small cave-like opening with an excellent overhead view of the zoo & dark blue mountains in the distance.
The adventurous ones in our group had climbed higher above the hole, & I, not wanting to miss out on the view, precariously climbed higher. Ankles teetering sideways, body leaning uncomfortably against the rocky structure, I climbed, slipping & sliding, up the side of the rock. My fellow travelers encouraged me, & soon I was settled up at the top, shaky & determinedly staying seated to be sure I would not fall, but feeling accomplished. From here, we could watch the sun disappear behind the faraway peaks & the sky grow a darker indigo.
We began the trek down as the light began to slowly fade. The majority of our group continued back down the way we had come, but the boys, once again, began down the face of the rock, & this time, my brother’s fiancé went with them. Not wanting to be the weakest link of the group, I decided to follow.
Rule number one of hiking: If you don’t think you can hike up the trail, you surely can’t hike back down. You would think that the trek up would be harder, but in truth, it’s the downhill that causes the majority of injuries. It’s much easier to slip & fall down the face of the rocks, & then gravity does its job of pulling you down until you hit something hard enough to stop you, which means it’s also hard enough to hurt you.
A quarter of the way down, I had realized my mistake. I was not wearing my hiking boots, I had zero rock climbing experience, & even more than that, I am afraid of heights. I like my feet on solid ground. Hiking is one of my favorite past times, & I have no problem hiking to high places, as long as my feet are firmly planted on the trail. But as soon as they inch a little too close to the drop, I start to shake.
This time was no different. Paralyzed with fear, adrenaline rushing through me, limbs shaking from the exertion of holding up my own body, I was stuck between swallowing my fear & being a quick learner, or falling down the face of the rock.
Luckily, I had help with me. Joseph, my dad & my brother assisted me step-by-step, helping me see the places to stick my feet & hands & reassuring me that, despite my doubts, my arms were strong enough to hold me when my feet were sliding. Tears springing my eyes, face turning red from exertion & embarrassment as I felt the eyes of everyone in the group on me, I shakily made it to the bottom & collapsed in sobs when I did, both of relief & humiliation.
“I’m so proud of you,” Joseph told me. “You’re so brave.” I did not feel proud, nor did I feel brave. I felt flush with shame & weak from my cowardice.
The members of the group hugged me, & we all went to the car together. Each told me how proud they were of me for climbing down, a feat that a number of others had done without a problem. I gave a shaky smile to each, but all I felt was self-consciousness at best, mortification at worst.
Just before climbing into our van, my dad stopped me & gave me a hug.
“I’m proud of you,” he told me.
“I’m so embarrassed,” I said quietly. “Everyone else did it without a problem.”
“You’ve never done it before, & you faced your fear,” my dad said. “Almost no one faces their fears. You were afraid, but you did it anyway, & that makes you brave.”
We left the rock face & drove back to our Airbnb. The original plan was to hit the grocery store, but it was evident no one really felt like shopping & cooking. A few minutes away from the store, we spotted a roadside taco truck with a permanent concrete sign claiming its location & bearing its name: Baja Tacos. A quick check in with the other occupants of the car revealed this was everyone’s preferred choice, & we quickly spun around & drove to the stand.
Going to an unknown taco truck is always a risk, but in this case, it was a risk worth taking. The food was inexpensive, but in no means cheap. We watched the chef work tirelessly inside the truck as we put in our orders, & a few minutes later, they were handed to us fresh & hot with a plethora of homemade sauces on the side. I ordered the fish tacos with chipotle sauce, which were served with cabbage, pico de gallo & guacamole on a fried corn tortilla.
To say the food was delicious would be an understatement. The flavors melded together to create a symphony on my tongue. It was creamy & crunchy, spicy & tangy, every bite nuanced & just as exciting as the last. And the spice was perfect – the burn built up in the back of my throat & stung my lips as I ate.
We ended the evening with a movie & then headed to bed, our skin sun-kissed goodnight by the desert.
I fell asleep thinking about the day’s events & how it ended. When I was packing for Arizona, I certainly didn’t expect this to be one of the first adventures I experienced. I was thinking of family time & mimosas, not scrambling down the side of a rockface with an expectant audience.
I remembered what my dad had said about bravery, my husband telling me he was proud of me, for doing something that everyone else had done with ease. But then I remembered, not everyone had done it. A few of us, perhaps you would call us brave or maybe even call us stupid, ventured down the rock face. And the achievement was not even the moment we made it down the rock, but that moment we each took a deep breath at the top & decided we were going to attempt it.
We all have different fears in life. Some of them we seem to be born with, & others we are conditioned to from life experiences. Some we call logical fears, & others can’t be explained but terrify us all the same. We react sometimes with tremors & shakes, while other times we become paralyzed & rooted to the spot. What is important in either situation is whether our next step is forward or back. Sometimes we go forth kicking & screaming, while other times, we go forward quietly, tears in our eyes & shaking head to toe. But whether we succeed or fail, we tried, & that’s what matters.
Climb your mountain, or in this case, stumble down into the valley. And if you are lucky enough to have a few loving voices by your side, listen to their words of comfort as you traverse around those dark & scary places where fear resides. It’s always much less scary in the dark when you have someone else by your side.
